Why living in the future is making you unhappy

I once knew someone who would always think about the next instance, next day, next year – never what’s happening in the present. Unsurprisingly, that brought in a lot of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. To some extent, we all know that person…we probably ARE that person.?

We are unhappy and comfortless – because we have mastered the art of being that way. We desire the future instead of living in the present, every single breath.?

Here’s a little secret though - the future never comes. This is all there is – the present moment.

If your mind is habitual to living in the future, no matter what you do, no matter however much money you get, however big plans you make, however diligent and organized you are - you will never be really blissful because you’re always thinking - let that big event in my life that I’ve been planning for happen (e.g. once I get a million dollars, once I get married, once I recover from a broken bone etc. etc.), and that’s when I will be happy. But that future is a changing goalpost, it never truly arrives - the million dollars goal will become 20 million dollars goal for example. Today, you live in tomorrow; tomorrow you will live in the day after and so on and so forth – your desires also keep adding layers to them, never really reaching a finality.?

We complain – life is miserable. Nope. It’s your desire that makes you miserable. Life is what it is – it’s like a river that flows. If you want to struggle against the current, it will swallow you with such a force that you will not know what happened. If you accept it, be a part of it, like a log (no matter how heavy the log is), you will float through it blissfully.

So in a nutshell, if you find yourself being unhappy all the time, do some introspection. Drop desires. Don’t try to drop unhappiness or numb it by binge watching Netflix or being addicted to short term solutions. Desire is a seed that once planted will lead to the fruit of unhappiness, if you are not careful.

You may argue that if I kill the desires, I kill my ambition, what is my life without ambition and goals, I will feel empty and unhappy. Well you don’t let go of the effort – do the hard work that you would put in towards your ambition anyway – I’m not talking about an excuse to be lazy and just sit in a corner while life happens around you. The trick is put in the hard work and effort, but roll with the punches and respect the flow of life.?

Lao Tzu gave a beautiful sentence that you may want to experiment with – “No one is as happy as I am because I have never asked for happiness.” Intellectually you will read this note in passing and it will not strike a chord. Experiment with it. Stop chasing and begging for happiness. Once you receive happiness without seeking, you will never make the mistake of chasing it again.

Life is not difficult; you are drowning because you struggle against the flow. Be one with the flow of life and see how beautifully the mind starts being blissful and struggles start getting easier.