Why is Leadership Presence Different for Women?

This photo was taken last September when I gave a Master Class on "The Power of Presence for Women Who Lead" in Nairobi at the 4th annual Pan African Transformational Leadership Summit. But, whether I am speaking in Kenya or Kuwait, Brussels or Brooklyn, I hear the same question from every audience: "Why is leadership presence different for women?"

To begin with, leadership presence is not an attribute automatically assigned to you because of your business results or title. It isn’t necessarily reflective of your true qualities and potential. Instead, it depends entirely on how others evaluate you. It's all about the impression you make. Being perceived as a leader when interacting with customers, peers, or executives, is the essence of leadership presence.

Here's the problem: Women face unique challenges when it comes to being perceived as leaders.

Executives—male and female—continue to take viable female candidates out of the running, often on the assumption that the woman can’t handle or want to do certain jobs. It’s no wonder that, when researchers ask both men and women to draw a picture of a leader, they’ll almost always draw a male figure.

Women also run headlong into the “double-bind paradox” where men can be both powerful and likeable, while women must project authority to advance in the business world, and the more powerful they appear, the less they are liked.

A frequently cited study, the Heidi/Howard case, shows that when the same highly assertive and successful leader is described to graduate students of both genders, that leader is seen as far more appealing when identified as a male rather than a female. Blame it on the stereotype of women as nurturing, sensitive, and collaborative (all highly effective and undervalued leadership attributes). When their behavior is congruent with these traits, women are liked but not seen as especially powerful. When their behavior runs counter to the stereotype, they are perceived negatively.

Women are constantly navigating these shifting gender expectations, social roles, and leadership requirements. To do so, the most successful women I’ve worked with are deeply aware of their personal values and boundaries while also maintaining a keen sense of how others perceive them. Because they understand that leadership presence is totally dependent on the impression they make, these savvy females can adapt and adjust their interactions to achieve the best outcome in a particular situation.

This awareness and flexibility pay off. Research at Stanford University Graduate School of Business also shows that women who are assertive and confident, but who can turn these traits on and off depending on the social circumstances, get more promotions than other women, or even than men.

Women who stand out as the talented leaders they truly are, understand and display the verbal and nonverbal behaviors that most powerfully impact the way others perceive them.

If you are planning a March (Women's History Month) event for the women in your organization, I invite you to consider my hour-long virtual offering. Please email me at [email protected] for details.