Why Justifying Yourself Causes You to Lose Power & Sales

Are you giving your power away and losing credibility?? Read this ????

People want to be on a winning team.

But often, when we feel attacked or not heard or desperately trying to grow our mission, we slip and start justifying ourselves.

??As someone who grew up in and out of hospitals, trying to advocate for myself and NOT being heard turned me into a constant justifier.

??It's the thing that drove me dedicating my life to getting my voice heard and training others to get theirs heard too.

So I get it on a deep level.

The costs are significant:

1. It Stops the Money Flow

When we justify why we deserve the gift, compliment, or the good in our lives, we often have something inside us that doesn’t really believe we are worthy to receive.

That lack of feeling worthy reads in your body language, posture, voice and energy. You lose credibility. People don't see you as powerful and therefore won't pay you the rate you want or offer you the bigger opportunities.

2. People Pity You Instead of Respecting You

For some people, justifying is an unhealthy attention grabber to push people to console, praise or feel sorry for us. But in the end, you don't gain the respect you deserve.

When we trust in the power of our message and understand how to craft it with conviction, people feel drawn to us. It automatically garners attention from a healthy space.

3. You are Seen as Trying Too Hard

Often, we feel compelled to justify as a result of the hurt we have experienced in our lives and the need to feel seen. In trying to get seen, people question why your trying so hard and if you are desperate. It breaks trust and loses you sales. It also opens the doors for them to take advantage of you.

4. We Lose the Upper Hand

Often, if we were punished in some way for our behavior or choices in the past, we justify to protect ourselves from further harm... only it causes more harm.

We end up say too much which gives our power to the other person. And quite often, end up disclosing information that could be used against us.

3 Things to Do Instead of Justifying Yourself

• Stop yourself when you catch yourself doing it
• Stick to facts. Don't go into more detail and story more than you need to.
• Re-direct the conversation by asking them questions

Going deeper...

When I work with my clients, I take them through the following:

1. Relaxation Exercises: When we are stressed, it stimulates the sympathetic nervous system which causes our brain to be scattered -- and when our brain is scattered, we end up saying a bunch of stuff we regret. Drawing from my degree in Kinesiology with a specialization in Relaxation Therapy, I train my clients on how to be aware of when the stress response has been activated and how to stimulate the relaxation response (the parasympathetic nervous system).
2. Voice and Body Language Exercises: When trying to get heard, we tend to talk too fast and the pitch of the voice goes up (which tunes people out). Body language tends to be more fidgety which causes a frenetic energy. I work with my clients on how to become fully anchored in their body so they look confident and their voice sound resonate and strong.
3. Messaging and Negotiation Development: A lot of people go into meetings and sales conversations under prepared. I work with my clients to dig into the deeper psychology of the person they want to influence and shape persuasive messaging. Then we work on mapping out their desires and boundaries so they do NOT undervalue themselves and instead, get what they want.

Ready to speak from your power??

??Get Personalized Strategy. Book your call with me >> HERE

?? Be Understood & Believable Free Video Training >> HERE

_______________________________________________________________________

Cindy Ashton is an Award-Winning TV host, Singer/Actor, Keynote Performer, Speak From Your Power? Trainer and Author of Liberate Your Voice: How to Trust Your Power In A World That Shuts You Down. Drawing from her extensive background working with Broadway Professionals, Emmy Winners, and Hollywood Celebrities, she is a master at showing her clients how to dramatically increase their sales, connection, and influence by learning how to get their voice heard in all parts of their business as well as go from Established to Known? in their industry. She been featured in multiple media, including ABC, Thrive Global, Inc. Magazine and Forbes.