Why I wrote The Maverick Mediator

Firstly, why 'The Maverick Mediator '?

I must admit to having been a maverick for as long as I can remember.

A few phrases can summarise my maverick thinking.

'Why are we doing this ?'

'What is the purpose of doing this ?'

'Does doing this achieve that purpose?'

'How can we do it better ?'

I wrote my second book, 'The Maverick Mediator,' to educate and inform people that my Chrysalis Method of workplace mediation is different from others for many reasons.

My starting point was that of an accredited Acas workplace mediator.

All references I have seen or heard concerning workplace mediation referred to 'parties.'

I took an instant dislike to this term.

It was confrontational and adversarial and reminded me of my police career when I had to deal with the criminal courts.

For a process meant to be voluntary and respectful of the needs of those engaged in a process intended to heal fractured or broken business relationships, the term 'participants ' was more inclusive.

More significantly, the traditional workplace mediation process was fundamentally flawed.

Invariably, participants are traumatised by the impact of the conflict. In my experience, the conflict can fester and deepen over long periods, even years!

Authentic rapport, trust and confidence between the mediator and the participants is an essential pre-condition for a successful mediation.

The custom and practice for workplace mediators is that the first time a traumatised participant meets the mediator is at the Individual Meeting stage. This is when the participant will explain their perspective on the conflict.

The challenges are self-evident.

These challenges are amplified by mediators who conduct their business online.

I always conduct mediations in person to ensure authentic trust and confidence in myself and the process.

I recalled that during my police career, when interviewing colleagues, victims, witnesses or suspects, I always looked to create rapport before commencing the interview.

This had the desired intention. People recognised that I knew I was communicating with a person, not just completing a task.

The necessity of doing so with traumatised people is evident.

I therefore created a unique 'Icebreaker ' or Pre-Mediation Meeting.

In doing so, I validate that the participant is truly at the heart of the process.

I introduce myself to the participants by email.

I signpost the process and seek confirmation that their participation is voluntary.

I reiterate to them that the process is confidential.

I confirm the neutral location of the venue for the process. A golf club is most conducive.

I do not require a detailed brief from the client organisation because that is subjective and risks undermining my objectivity, independence, neutrality and fairness.

During the icebreaker, we do not discuss the matters subject to the mediation.

I meet one-on-one in person with the individual participant.

I see a positive change in the psychological state of traumatised people.

I discuss my relevant background and my expertise and signpost the process.

The following example proves the value of the icebreaker.

I always mediate between conflicted senior teams.

On this occasion, there were five members of a Senior Leadership team.

All of the participants were women.

This participant looked terrified when I first met her.

After sorting teas, coffee and water, we began.

When I asked her if she had previous experience of mediation this is what she told me:

" I am 34 years old .

When I was 17, I was being mercilessly bullied at school.

The Headmaster said he would mediate."

" What happened ?" I asked.

She replied, " Myself and the bully went to the headmaster's office. We sat opposite each other. The Headmaster sat in the corner."

"Then what ?" I asked.

" The bully shouted and swore at me for an hour. Then the headmaster looked at his watch and said, " The mediation is over ."

I said, " What happened next?"

She replied, " The bully beat me up again."

I signposted the mediation process for her.

She sighed deeply, smiled and said, " Thank you. For 17 years, I have thought of this whenever I hear the word 'mediation'. I can't thank you enough."

The key feature of my mediation process compared to other mediators is that we do not meet as strangers when I meet participants at the Individual Meeting.

Feedback from participants at the end of the Individual Meeting is that they have spoken to me about their deep Interest-level issues rather than engaged with me, superficially at a Position level.

I trust that you can now understand why I wrote this book.

Here is a link to Amazon for my book.

https://amzn.to/3M947Yz

I hope you found this article interesting.

The Role is not the Person.