Why I Write Long Articles
One of the criticisms I hear the most when it comes to my writing is that my articles are too long, convoluted and dark.
That’s about right. You see, I’m not from the populist school of motivation where I’m a “Monk who sold my Ferrari”; “If you think it you can achieve it”; “You attract what you think” and so forth.
In fact, I’d rather die than come off the mountain with 10 Commandments of how to live your life. The ink from my pen will dry up before I ever give you “The 5 Steps to Happiness; The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People; The 3 Rules To Enlightenment and 50 Ways To Fight Your Fears.
I Can’t Look Into The Shattered Heart
How can I ever really walk in your shoes?
- How can I ever look into the shattered heart of a mother who’s just lost a child and say, “This is what you should do …”?
- Or say to someone who’s been betrayed, “Don’t worry, it’s part of your life journey … the right person for you will come along.”
- Or look at someone who’s just lost her business and doesn’t know how she’s going to school and feed her children and say, “Don’t worry, most millionaires have gone bankrupt three times before they succeeded … just hang in there.”
If it were as easy as the “10 Commandments and the 5 Steps to Happiness”, both you and I would be totally secure, powerful, fulfilled and living in harmony with every other creature on this planet, wouldn’t we?
Nobody Can Write Your Script
Don’t get me wrong – security, happiness, fulfilment, power and harmony are absolutely achievable. It’s just never going to happen according to a script someone else has written for you. Those that claim to know the secret are probably just as lost as you and I. They wear masks, just like you and me. And, one day when someone throws a stone at them, they’re going to duck and the mask is going to shift … have a look at them then and see what’s really going on. In reality, our journey to happiness is going to be convoluted. It’s going to be one step forward and three steps backwards. There’ll be pain and heartache on the way. There’ll be moments of unbridled joy and moments of unrivalled sadness.
Those who criticise my writing are right. I’m not an easy read. My work is gritty, dark and stark of candy floss. It’s clear that I struggle to be articulate. It’s clear that I struggle with concepts and my own place in the world. It’s clear that I struggle to figure things out. It’s clear that I struggle.
A lot of my writing is a reflection of my own struggle to make sense of this uncertain life. My themes are darker – loss, fear, death, redemption, surrender, regret and wrong turns.
But it is in my inward struggle and inward reflection, that I’m getting a semblance of what it’s going to take for me to be happy, fulfilled and harmonious.
If I really think about it, my take is that both the good and the bad happen to us to shape us into the beings we are today and the beings we are to become. If I really interrogate my view of the world, it’s frightening in one sense, and liberating in another.
I’m Not In Control
There’s a dim realisation deep in me that says, “You’re not in control of your destiny … something bigger than you is pulling the strings.” I have a feeling that my journey has been mapped out already. The only ‘control’ I have is how I use the cards that I’m dealt. That’s where I get to use my greatest gift … choice. The only time I’m ever in control is when I choose how I’m going to respond to anything that’s dished up to me.
When something bad happened to me and someone said, “Everything happens for a reason,” I used to get angry. Seriously, what a patronising response to my misfortune. I don’t get angry anymore when someone uses the ‘everything happens for a reason’ refrain. I’m starting to believe that it’s true. The author, Douglas Adams put it better than I ever could, “I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I know I ended up where I needed to be.”
I attempt to end every article on a positive and uplifting note, I really do. But it’s clear that my ‘happy endings’ are not bright, revelatory sunrises. They’re more like morning mist over a muddy moor … enough light to see, but not enough light to totally trust the treacherous path.
I know that any ‘success’ I’ve had is tainted by shades of grey. Think about it. I would imagine for every ‘success’ we’ve had in our lives there has been some collateral damage along the way:
- Maybe you become financially successful but lose your health and family along the way.
- Maybe you win the girl/guy and shatter your competitor’s heart in the process.
- Maybe you get to run a country but sell your soul to the devil for the privilege.
- Maybe you get to worship your God at the expense of someone else’s God.
- Maybe you get to live in the lap of luxury off the sweat of slaves.
- Maybe that diamond on your finger is a ‘blood diamond’ and tens of thousands of people died for that privilege.
So, pretty much all success is tainted in one form or another.
We’ve Been Sold A Lie By Hucksters and Charlatans
I believe that we’ve been sold a lie (by hucksters and charlatans) that life is easy and that there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel. Are we really so naive to believe that we will experience the perfect life – a forever-adoring wife/husband. Kids that love us unconditionally? The house with the white picket fence. Two cars and two dogs. And, when we meet our maker, it’ll be at age 80 from a heart attack at 3 am in our sleep. Painless and quick. How awesome would that be? And, how’s that working out for you?
You see, my articles are long, tortuous and uncertain because I know that I don’t have easy answers for those that read my work. In fact, I’m just a bit of a poser. I pose more questions than give answers.
My Articles Are Tortuous
- I’ll never be so arrogant as to think I can walk in your shoes and feel what you feel.
- I’ll never be so crass as to say, “Everything happens for a reason” when you have lost your job, your child, your health or your relationship.
- I can’t ever feel what it’s like to be inside your skin.
- I can’t ever really feel your pain.
I can just struggle with you and try an make sense of this journey.
That’s all I can do.
I can only give my infinitely small take on how I deal with things in my own life and hope that it sparks something in you. More often than not, I realise that I’m just the pen and that something bigger than me is steering my hand. Maybe I just write to figure things out for myself, who the hell knows.
I wrestle and wrangle with life every day and that’s why I write long articles.
More articles by Jacques de Villiers
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