Why I think we should talk more about cultural diversity?

Yesterday, was a glorious Sunday in my Swabian village and I went for a hike. The serpentine route led me past one of my favorite ice cream vending machine. The older couple in front of me had their back to me – I waited patiently, enjoying being enveloped by the fresh caress of the first sunny day this year – my gaiety in perfect harmony with the jolly weather.?

Then they turned around, I said a cheerful “Grü? Gott” (hello) – they recoiled, aghast – the man mumbled in obvious disgust – “they are everywhere. The government needs to stop letting them into our country.” I stiffened. That stung.

Occurrences like these are traumatic – and yes, they still do happen to me. And it is easy to say "shrug them off, or tell them off". When layered, you just can't simpy shrug them off. Racism is trauma.

I wrote this piece last year and shared with some close friends. I sat down yesterday, pensively read it again and shook my head. So apt. And I would love to share it with my network today. Here we go:

I would be lying if I say this is a celebration (referring to International Day of Cultural Diversity) – to me it is not. It is a reminder of the need of open dialogue, continuous education to break intrinsic cultural biases because they still do exist!

I am a Cameroonian. I am a German. I am a sum total of my cultural experiences. However, as a black woman and mother to two beautiful black boys, I am rudely jolted by the “othering” of our blackness. There seems to be a conscious or unconscious anxiety caused by our black-germaness. Here are some aspects which bother me and why we all need education. Bear with me, this is a long one.

The othering

The constant – where are you from? (no! I mean, where your roots originate), not where you were born, is a question that subconsciously severs blackness from being German. That question which bears the semblance of curiosity, sometimes masks the label – “you don’t fit in”. I cannot tell you how many times I am accosted by this question, by strangers – I mean I love my roots, but it should not be a differentiating factor to underscore why I am not German. The gaze of the people on the streets – the “what-is-she-doing-here” gaze! is a constant accompanying “othering”. This is seen in the police guy who can barely disguise his surprise when I whip out my “ausweis” (ID Card) or the clerk at the home office who could not come to terms with the fact that as a German, I did not need to present a visa! She wrestled with these two irreconcilable concepts until her colleague asked her – “Do you as a German, need a visa in Germany?” – ooooohhhhhh!

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Racial hierarchy in culture

I still shudder when I think of the perception of race in culture – if our cultural differences are all equal, why then are some cultures branded “primitive” and some “modern”? There is no concealing the fact that the more melanated you are, the further you get relegated down you the cultural hierarchical ladder. Which is why, being a black in Germany seems to attract the constant need to be “taught” what is right and courteous. Because there is no way on earth you could be civilized – as seen in the driver who bellowed to me “where did you get your führerschein (driver’s license) this is not the jungle” or the lady (stranger to us all) in a restaurant who (unsolicited) decides to “teach” my son how to hold a fork properly at 3!

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Let’s talk language

I learnt to speak German at 24 and my colleagues and close friends always tell me, how good my German is – I cannot help but swell with pride each time they tell me that. My boys were both born in Düssledorf, their German is impeccable and enriched by the influence of other languages they speak (English and a bit of French, and Chinese for my 2nd boy). They are my teachers at home – because I never seem to get the articles right – der, die, das can be “stolpersteine” (stumbling blocks) a lot of the time. But does speaking good English or good German equal intelligence? There seems to be a rather an infantilization of people who cannot express themselves in German – as seen in the sales attendant at Zara – who rolls her eyes and proceeds to give me a lecture on “der and not die Rei?verschluss” (zipper), or the concierge at a renowned hotel who all but reduced his speed speech by 50% to slowly and loudly explain how to use the hotel key.

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The conditioning of belonging and foreignness

We are all conditioned by our experiences – the things we know, those we see, the media, our friends, parents etc. It is therefore not surprising to see that we are somehow conditioned to equate black to “fremd” (foreign) / not belonging. The foreignness of the black in Germany is also highlighted by the media. The mediated image of black people is one fraught with poverty, disease, unfed, negativity, flight from the blight of war, escaping into a glorified society – which translates into the German society is doing you a favor to accommodate your blackness. These aspects condition the conscious or unconscious perception of the black German – and again, informs the “othering”. This causes somewhat unease when confronted with blackness which is very much German – like how in Einstein's name can a black German speak Swabian? Again, the foreignness is a constant reminder that the media seem to flailingly hang unto by institutionalizing certain tags – “der aus Ghana stammende Deutsche” (the German man who originates from Ghana) or “der Deutsch-Afrikaner” (German-African) – to highlight the roots of “the other” Germans.?This conditioning is an unconscious bias that rears its head in the most unexpected circumstances – just like the old man at the butcher who seems so surprise that my sons speak "perfect German" – or my son’s classmate’s mother who is surprised that my Sp?tzle tastes better than hers. Or when some are surprised that I actually studied at a university... Bless them, it is inconceivable that some blacks actually hold degrees in higher education.

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The choice and not the coercion of immigration

As long as we continue to perceive immigration of blacks as a concept that is coerced, the societies in which they find themselves will continue to treat them as unwanted species. This is mostly the case with black Africans. While blacks from other countries like England, America, Cuba, Brazil are revered, blacks from Africa are perceived as forced to exile, fleeing from war or some kind of persecution. I came to Germany on my own volition, I wanted to study and reunite with my sister Dr. med. Julia Dikopoulos . I was not forced to stay and live in Germany. It is a choice I made – just like the choice I made to become German. Choiced immigration and not coerced immigration is a concept that the society seems to be impervious to, when it comes to blacks. Hence, they seem to have the mistaken impression that they can simply just take your Germanness away from you – as seen in the guy at local waste collection point, who threatens to get me sent back “home” after an altercation. If I were to count the number of times I have been told to “go back where I came from”…

I have spent almost half of my life in Germany – and my boys know no other home apart from Germany. We are still foreigners in our chosen homes – because that is how society perceives us.

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Yesterday was International Day of Cultural Diversity, a day which should be a reminder of how we need to constantly educate ourselves so we understand our differences and common interests. Cultural diversity is important. It fosters equality, equity, respect and open-mindedness for other cultures and mindsets.

It is that necessary condiment for social education – because when we understand other people’s perspectives we educate ourselves, and it prompts us to engage with other experiences, different from what we are groomed to know.

I know I derailed in my attempt to rein you in on why cultural diversity is important. And yes, did I cause you to feel an uncomfortable stiffening in your spine? Then, do something about it. Start a conversation and learn how to eradicate some of these underlining biases – and educate others too. Speak out! We all have these biases.

And what’s more, that stiffening you feel, is a default trauma pose many people assume in Germany, who are considered the “the others” because of their roots. We are constantly bracing ourselves for the next conscious or unconscious barrage of comments or questions, or that quizzical gaze that accompanies us on the streets, or the hushed whispers and fingers pointed at you – ear-shattering indications that we don’t belong to our chosen homes.?

I hope we continue to educate ourselves. I hope we learn to understand that each one of us, through meticulous acts of empathy can and should make our contributions towards a more just, and equitable world. A world where people are not subjected to trauma because of their race, gender, ethnicity, or immigration choice.

Happy International Day of Cultural Diversity!