Why I Failed.

I was struggling. I thought I was competent at my job, but I wasn't doing well. Despite this, I loved working for my manager. We would sit and talk for hours about family, life, and career goals. He constantly said "how can I help?" I never had a good answer. I thought maybe it was training, or effort, or external factors like my territory or goals. Often though, I was at a loss. My manager was as well. He said at one point: "I just don't know why it's not working."

I started attending voluntary training meetings in a desperate attempt to be better at my role. One lunch, as I sat in the back of our sleek new conference room I heard a speech that changed my life forever. Another manager stood up and relayed a question that was previously asked of him: "Is this a job, a career, or a passion?"

He continued: "If this is a job, it's a great job. We have ping pong tables and beer on tap. We leave early some sunny days and serve pizza if people stay late. If it's a career, it's a tremendous career opportunity. I've worked my way up in this organization and you can too. We offer retirement and great health benefits. We have daycare and wellness classes. However, you will never know true success and happiness unless this is your passion."

"You will never know true success and happiness unless this is your passion"

At that moment it clicked for me, I didn't have a passion for it. At the end of the day, the success or failure of my clients didn't inspire me to action. I didn't wake up, make phone calls, reply to emails, search down answers, or perform any job duties with a passion for helping my clients.

Ultimately, I found my passion in helping nonprofits. Working hand-in-hand with organizations who build affordable housing, cure diseases, and feed the hungry has been the most life-affirming job I've ever had. Some days I feel sad that I drifted for so long before I came to this realization. Other days I feel even more sad others may never find their true passion.

I share this for those that are stuck in a role where they constantly hear "how can I help?" Sometimes we have to ask that question: Is this your job, is this career, or is this your passion? If it is your job, is that enough? If it's your career, is that okay? If it's not your passion, is it time to go find it?