Love Thy Haters

I posted aspects of my authentic self recently and got trounced with hate. Ever have that happen to you?

It certainly wasn't the first time, and it can come from unexpected people.

It was, however, an intentional effort to refine my inner circle by simply expressing myself. Let those unfit to share space show themselves... and then show themselves out! Talk about automation!

If my perceived peers can't share space in times of peace, I'm grateful to learn that before times of personal life challenges or when reaping rewards of great success and referring others their way.

A pretty solid rule of thumb is: having the same viewpoint is not a requirement, however, being a decent human being and understanding/loving the person beyond differences IS.

Having different viewpoints doesn't mean you have to attack others.

For example, my best friend of ~14 years and I are polar opposites in a lot of ways... lifestyle, politics, and love life to name a few. We know and respect each other's hearts first and foremost and love each other as human beings regardless of how differently we were made.

Even if she used her voice to counter mine in an area meaningful to her, it wouldn't disrupt our relationship because the foundation of love and respect remains of support to each other.

Keeping those worthy in and allowing haters to excuse themselves out is a huge benefit to your mental wellbeing.

Regardless of the who, what, and why, here are some key things we all need to keep in mind:

• Everyone on this planet is unique and that's a great thing! Imagine how boring the world would be if there were only one color, song, meal, outfit, shape, etc. I'm grateful for depth of diversity.
• Being misunderstood is inevitable. Facing people that can't relate or take the time to get to know where you're coming from is just part of life. It doesn't make you bad or wrong for being authentically who you are, so don't allow conflicting opinion to automatically internalize into shame, etc.
• Having compassion for others' authenticity builds compassion for your own. When you see others posting things that they are passionate about, even if you can't relate, think to yourself, "Good for them speaking their truth." without negatively engaging your energy and move on.

Building this pattern begins to internalize and encourage inward exploration and expression of your own authentic uniqueness.

It takes effect in the opposite direction too.

When people trounce on others for being themselves, it builds their own inner critic and fears of what others will say to them if they dare express themselves. They tend to keep thinking limiting thoughts and playing below their full potential.

Let's not back peddle and join them, shall we!?

How to Love Your Haters

First, having a strong sense of self-love, confidence, compassion, inner peace, grace, and gratitude is key.

If you are at the beginning of your journey in any of these areas, please seek a free consultation with me so we can get you thriving in your full potential.

1. Upon acknowledging an incoming negative interaction, mindfully acknowledge a forcefield around your self-worth, inner peace, and compassion. Strengthen this forcefield with a daily mediation practice.
2. Graciously allow people to misunderstand you. When people with different viewpoints attack others, they are displaying their lack of inner work. Lean into grace and compassion for where they are in their journey because, again, they also don't have the same perspective/wiring as you and are likely way off of understanding the topic they're throwing themselves into.
3. Send them light and love. End the exchange with authentic, heartfelt well-wishes. WHAT?!?! WHY?!?! I'm grateful you asked, three reasons:

• We're not going to carry their negative energy with us. This internally associates fear/regret/negative energy with you putting yourself out there going forward. Not helpful.
• It reinforces that you know, value, and respect your self-worth and that you don't have to justify or explain it to those unwilling to understand.
• They clearly have more inner work to do and we don't know what they may be going through. Wishing them well on their journey not only brings some light into their obvious dark, and also helps summon that light in yours when you inevitably need it.