Why having Cochlear Surgery will not change my approach to navigating through life using Auslan (Australian Sign Language)

Most of you will undoubtedly know by now, that I started to lose my hearing about 5 years ago. The Drs and audiologists, suspect it has been happening for longer - however, I am very good at getting by through using visual cues such has reading body language, reading lips and grasping "context" of conversations - rather than individual words.

5 years ago I was diagnosed with mild hearing loss - sitting about about 70% deafness... now, I am sitting at "severe" 80-80% deafness - and the grasping of context in conversations is getting closer to "guess work" than I am comfortable with.

So it was recommended that I go down a path, that I had never even considered previously... getting a cochlear implant.

Why was this never an option for me? Well i guess, similar to others in the d/Deaf and HoH community, I didn't believe i needed "fixing" - this was my world of hearing, and if I could navigate it - then why should i get it "fixed"? I had this belief that me fixing it made things easier "more comfortable" for others rather than myself.

I am an avid believer in having access to sign language, and in my home we use Auslan (Australian Sign Language) - I use it with my husband, my 13 month old daughter and even the dog, and if you think that my daughter doesn't understand - you are very much mistaken. She has access to more words than any other 13 month old I have encountered.. with over 40 words in auslan.

So you can imagine, when I started to explore the idea of having a cochlear and the surgeon said "you won't need Auslan anymore" - there was an immediate reaction of "I am not doing it".

When I sat down and thought about it, i realised that all the surgeon did, was what many hearing people do... try to make life easier and more "normal" - without understanding that sign language is easy for me, it is normal. What having access to more hearing will do for me is reduce the guess work from those I work with who don't use sign language, reduce my hearing fatigue and the foggy headaches I get everyday come 7pm (from too much closed caption reading and guess work), and will keep me safe in the environment by giving me some more sound awareness.

It will also prolong my career.. because as hard as we are working to change the way we work with people from the d/Deaf and HoH communities in Accenture - we are not "there" yet... I still have some work to do to bridge the gap where I can. So maybe being able to understand a little more of what is being said to me will help.

Why am I sharing this really personal journey? Maybe it's selfish.. maybe I want people to understand what I am going through - something I have been a little closed off to myself, maybe I want people to stop thinking cochlears are the "ulitmate tool to fix deafness" - or maybe, I am looking for a little acceptance and education around understanding a bi-model world that includes spoken and sign languages - and given it is International Day of Sign Languages.. surely thats a good thing.

A final thought. I am really nervous about this procedure - contrary to the sometimes cavalier way I speak about it, I am worried it will change me, I am worried it will change the way people see me and treat me, I am worried about no longer fitting into a community that I love; the d/Deaf and HoH community.. but one thing I am not worried about - this will not change my use of Auslan.

Naomi