Why ‘Having It All’ Doesn’t Mean Doing It All – and How to Overcome the Challenges
Maria Newman
Helping high-achieving working mums regain confidence, reconnect with themselves and silence their inner critic so they can handle life's chaos, curveballs and meltdowns and start living with clarity and purpose.
I see you.
You’re the one keeping everything together.
The one who remembers the school trips, the work deadlines, the birthdays and the fact that the fridge is running dangerously low on milk.
You’re the glue, right?
Because if you don’t do it, who will?
You’re the planner, the organizer and the one everyone turns to when things need sorting. And let’s be honest, you’re amazing at it.
Yet, there’s a cost.
You’re exhausted.
You feel like you’re running on empty, always behind and never quite able to catch your breath. You tell yourself this is just how life is. After all, isn’t this what ‘having it all’ looks like?
Let’s pause that thought for a moment.
What if having it all didn’t mean doing it all?
What if you could still be the incredible woman you are without burning yourself out in the process?
Why This Matters
High-achieving working mums like you face a unique set of challenges. You’ve worked hard for your career and you love your family fiercely. Yet, somewhere along the way, the idea of ‘having it all’ morphed into ‘doing it all.’ And that is a recipe for burnout.
High-achieving women often carry an invisible burden, the belief that they must be all things to all people. It’s what I see time and again in my coaching sessions. You’re navigating challenges, setbacks and life transitions, yet still feel you have to be the one holding everything together.
This is where confidence, self-esteem and mindset come into play. When you believe your worth is tied to how much you do, you stay stuck in an endless cycle of over-giving and under-receiving. All of which is not sustainable.
What if I told you that having it all doesn’t mean doing it all? That real success isn’t about spinning more plates but knowing which ones to put down.?
As Brené Brown wisely said, “Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.” And that’s the crux of it. You don’t have to do everything to be enough.
What Happens When You Stop Doing It All
Let’s imagine for a moment that you step back. You delegate. You set boundaries. You let go of things that drain you. What happens?
What You Can Do Instead
Rather than stretching yourself thinner, it’s time to work smarter instead of harder. Here’s how.
Drop the Superwoman Cape?
No one is expecting you to do it all, except maybe you. Start questioning the unrealistic expectations you’ve set for yourself. Would you expect your best friend to do everything you’re doing? Probably not.?
Shift Your Mindset: You’re Not the Only One Who Can Do It
It’s easy to believe that if you don’t do it, it won’t get done or at least not properly. Other people are more capable than you think so give them the chance. Let go of perfection and start delegating.
Set Boundaries Without Guilt
Just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should. Start saying no to things that drain your energy. Protect your time as fiercely as you would for your children. If it’s not essential, let it go.?
Make Yourself a Priority
Self-care isn’t selfish, it’s essential. Book that massage, read that book or take that walk. Whatever fills your cup, make time for it. When you look after yourself, you show up better for everyone else.?
Reconnect With What You Actually Want
What do you want? Not what your boss, partner or kids need. What do you need? Take a moment to think about what makes you feel fulfilled, energised and alive. Then make space for it in your life.?
As Oprah Winfrey says, “You can have it all. Just not all at once.”
Let’s Make This Happen
You don’t have to prove yourself by taking on more. You don’t have to carry the world on your shoulders to be valuable. You already are. The real shift happens when you step back, take control and start living for yourself, not just for everyone else.?
If this resonates, get in touch. I help high-achieving working mums like you regain confidence, reconnect with who they are and silence that inner critic. Let me help you get to a place where ‘having it all’ feels fulfilling and not exhausting.
Your first step is to BOOK a call with me.