Why Gratitude in the Workplace is More Important Than Ever

On Christmas Eve I received a terrible text. The NHS notification I had been fearing. I tested positive for COVID-19. After 10 months of doing everything I could to avoid it, the nasty virus found a way into our home after an outbreak at my son’s school.

I felt a sense of disappointment, anger, and eventually despair creeping in. Would I get lucky and be asymptomatic or would I find myself in a hospital ward that was bursting at the seams with other critically ill patients? The truth was neither. As millions of people fighting against COVID, the reality was that this virus would not kill me, but it would still rob me of life.

Christmas 2020 turned out to be one of the darkest periods I’ve ever experienced. Even now, thinking of what I could say about this time is a struggle. Put simply, I couldn’t be the husband and father I needed to be when those I love the most needed me most. I’ve tried to push it so far back in my mind, but with this pain and suffering, I believe there is a lot I’ve learned both personally and professionally.

This pandemic has hit many employees hard. That’s putting it mildly. In many cases, the pandemic has upended our lives in so many unexpected ways that trying to manage our private lives, the wellbeing of ourselves and our families, on top of our jobs and careers can seem like a battle stuck in a loop.

Many of us fight these battles alone in the workplace. We try to persevere through it, trying to avoid a feeling of vulnerability, even when we are in our most vulnerable state. Everyone is fighting demons of one sort or another whether we recognize them or not, and most of us are unaware of what is plaguing our colleagues. After facing my own demons and trying to suppress them as much as possible, I learned valuable lessons about gratitude that made all the difference.

Don’t Fight the Demons Alone

You are not alone. No matter your environment or situation at home or in the workplace there is always someone closer than you think that cares and can offer you a helping hand. It can be difficult to open up and it can seem pointless to try to get people to understand what you’re going through. Still, we must find a way. When I lost my sense of smell and taste I was devastated. Then I found an online community of people going through the same experience, I listened to medical experts explain why this was happening, and then I watched YouTube videos showing how to conduct smell training. I’ve never purchased so many scented oils in my life in the desperate attempt to catch a whiff of something, anything!

At a time when I felt completely hopeless, losing all sense of smell and taste, it was a sense of gratitude that ultimately saved me. While my body was full of aches I was not fighting for my next breath. While my sleep was constantly interrupted by shivers and cold sweats, I would still wake up in the morning. While I was experiencing a range of symptoms, my wife and children had escaped mostly unharmed and they would be there for me when I couldn’t be there for them. As hard as it was, when I went back to work, I looked for reasons to be thankful, reasons to get up in the morning and keep the demons away.

Tell Others What You Appreciate About Them

When was the last time you checked in on one of your colleagues without an agenda, just to see how they were doing? It’s so easy to get caught up with everything we have to do at work. The tasks, meetings, deadlines, projects, customers, and meeting the expectations of others leave little if any time to do anything for ourselves. What we many times forget is the people working alongside us, especially when they aren’t in the same room. This is when sharing your appreciation for others matters more than you can imagine.

When nothing else seems to be going right giving and receiving gratitude is the one thing that can help us feel better about ourselves and others. Things may not be going the way we want them to but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t notice the hard work of others and take a moment to acknowledge them and give them thanks. Being too busy is never an excuse for not showing gratitude. There are more ways than one to show how much you appreciate your people. The best thing of all? Give and you shall receive. Maybe not immediately, maybe not the next day, maybe not in the ways you expect, but eventually you reap what you sow.

Be Fair and Compassionate, Especially When the Going Gets Tough

Even in the face of mistakes, problems, and failures, it’s important to keep a sense of gratitude. Actually, this is when it matters most. A call that didn’t go well with your manager. The unhappy customer didn’t get what they wanted. An argument or disagreement between you and another team member. It’s so easy to let unhelpful emotions take over during these moments. We might become so defensive that we stop listening or even caring about the other person. The assumptions we make tend to lead us into a self-fulfilling prophecy that only further deepens the conflict rather than helps us find solutions.

Your manager may be going through a difficult experience– have you offered to take something off their shoulders? Your customer might be facing changing priorities– have you asked them what you could do differently to help? Your co-worker might think you’re not taking their views into consideration – have you acknowledged that you care about their opinions and want to hear them? It’s not always easy to be fair and compassionate, especially when you feel the other person is unreasonable and inconsiderate but trying to appreciate what others are going through is the first step in the right direction.

Be Genuine with Your Gratitude

The insincere or repetitive ‘thanks’ can be worse than not saying it at all. While a simple thank-you can be a great way to start showing your gratitude, on its own it can quickly become meaningless. Thanks for what? What are you really thankful for? Is that it? Being genuine with your gratitude not only means feeling gratitude but also demonstrating it through your actions, not just your words.

If you are truly thankful that a colleague was able to take most of your work while you were away what might you send their way to make them feel special? If you know a team member has had to work evenings or weekends to finish a project what can you do to support them? We all go through times when we wish others could show more gratitude towards us, but equally, we can forget to show our appreciation to those around us. Don’t wait to feel appreciated in order to show appreciation, you might be the spark that is needed. There’s nothing more genuine than finding gratitude within yourself, and showing it to others when you yourself feel underappreciated.

Now that many of us are spending more time than ever working from home and away from our teammates I believe it’s become more important than ever to embrace and reflect gratitude in the workplace. Some of us might feel we are better than others in being able to put our head down and get our work done with little or no recognition or appreciation but that doesn’t mean we need it or should give it any less. I used to believe I was that kind of person. My resiliency and perseverance are enough. I can get through anything on my own. Then COVID hit me and knocked me down. It reminded me of the saving grace that the sense of gratitude can provide when my other senses had failed me.