Why a Firm No is Better Than a Weak Yes

LIFE LESSON

Earlier this month, I was asked to contribute to a year-long module focused on helping entrepreneurs develop their own paths. My specific installment concerned collaboration and how to identify strategic partners, part of which included an interview.

While collaboration is perilously close to becoming buzzworded to death, it’s true that many hands make light work. A focused group of people with complementary talents and matching energies can focus their gifts on the attainment of a common goal.

As I’ve moved into the solopreneur space, my inner voice has become more prominent (by either necessity or design), and as a result, I’ve become more in tune with honoring it. When you factor in the reality that time literally IS money for those who bill their expertise by the hour, in order to be most effective, we must be surgical in our yes-es and equally emphatic about our no-s.

As an entrepreneur, how can you gather these people to you? How can you attract like-minded people who can help you achieve your common goals?

The short answers?

? Be crystal clear about your strengths, abilities and energies

? Learn how to say no to tasks of which you may be capable, but will redirect you from your ultimate goal

? Learn to accept another’s “no” without taking it personally

? Know what you want and need

? Be willing to offer your gifts as they fit into the whole

#SpoilerAlert: If you wish to make something happen, you are going to hear no a lot. Make peace with this. Don’t take it personally. Take the lesson from the no and move on to the next prospect/investor/partner.

Most people who are known as decision makers in their organizations operate from the known, and the truly powerful are completely fine with the word no. “No” is an answer. People who spend an inordinate amount of time trying to bluff or who otherwise hide their imperfections using flimsy yes-es ultimately cost investors time and energy, both of which are precious commodities.

When you hear a polite, but firm ‘no,’ you have encountered a known entity. Hearing a wishy washy ‘yes’ that never materializes represents living in limbo. Your plans will remain on hold or in stasis because your resources are nebulous.

Learn to release the weak yes-es. It will make room in your life for the right collaborator.

LIFE HACK

Today is National Hydration Day! Drinking plenty of water is probably the number one life hack of all time. If you’re a fan of the 1990s TV show Star Trek, The Next Generation, you may recall an episode where a particularly cranky/hostile species, upon meeting the crew of the Enterprise referred to them as “mostly bags of water.”

Water is important for every cell in the body to function properly. The digestive system functions better with adequate hydration, preventing constipation. Water also helps flush toxins from the body, promotes good kidney function, keeps your joints and muscles lubricated, supports healthier and younger-looking skin, and helps regulate body temperature.

The Mayo Clinic recommends this minimum daily intake of water:

Women — 11.5 cups, or 92 ounces

Men — 15.5 cups, or 124 ounces

Anyone can become dehydrated, but certain people are at a greater risk, including infants, young children and people who work or exercise outdoors. In addition, older adults are more likely to become dehydrated.

Here are some tips for upping your water game:

? Flavor it. Add fruit to your water. Lemons, limes and oranges are tried and true. Cucumber, watermelon, strawberries and herbs also are delicious options.

? Tie it into a routine. Drink a glass of water every time you brush your teeth, eat a meal or use the bathroom.

? Eat it. Many fruits and vegetables have a high water content, including melon, cucumbers, lettuce and celery.

? Track it. Invest in a high-tech bottle that connects to your smartphone and records how much you drink. Or set an alarm as a reminder and track your intake in your calendar.

? Challenge a friend. Kick off a healthy competition with a friend or your kids to see who can meet their guzzling goal most often.

? Take it to go. It can be challenging to drink enough water when you are on the go. Fill your water bottle before you leave home, and bring it along on your daily travels.

? Alternate your drinks. If you can’t give up soda or juice completely, try alternating with water. Each time you finish a glass of water, switch to soda or juice and vice versa.

Especially during this heat wave, please be sure to stay hydrated!

TREAT

Summer is officially upon us. If your kids are starting to get bored, why not help them learn a musical skill? or music theory? Here are some free resources to get you started: Hoffman Academy and Drum Ambition offer free tutorials and practice sheet music to beginning learners. MusicTheory.net also offers free lessons on music theory for those looking for a more advanced understanding, and MuseScore is a free, open source site for composing and notating sheet music. Additionally, SoundGym can help you learn audio engineering and recording for free.

If you don't have kids, this musical treat can also benefit YOU. Music has a positive impact on your mental health, so check these out!

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An author, media consultant, life coach and speaker, Molly Cantrell-Kraig has been recognized as one of CNN’s Visionary Women, been profiled by both the Christian Science Monitor and the Shriver Report. Cantrell-Kraig has also been interviewed on the Women’s Media Center and the BBC, speaking on such topics as women, independence, gender roles and life transitions. From her beginnings as a single mother on welfare, Cantrell-Kraig is a self-described work in progress whose focus is on helping others achieve their goals by sharing her own experiences.