Why Every Child Deserves to Feel Seen: The Moment My Son Asked, “Mum, Why Am I Different?”

I still remember the day my son, Harry, came home from school at the age of seven and asked me a question that stopped me in my tracks:

"Mum, why am I different?"

His voice was small, uncertain, and full of something I knew all too well: self-doubt. It wasn’t just a passing question; it was the moment he realised that school didn’t feel the same for him as it did for his classmates.

The Age of Awareness: When Differences Become Visible

At seven years old, children begin to compare their abilities with their peers. Research shows this is when neurodivergent children often experience a painful realisation; they are struggling in ways their friends might not be.

A study published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry found that children with learning differences, such as dyslexia, ADHD, or autism, often experience a drop in self-esteem between the ages of 7 and 9 as they start to recognise their challenges.

For my son, this moment came in the middle of Year 2. Spelling tests became more frequent, reading books got harder, and writing tasks that once seemed fun turned frustrating. He saw his friends finishing their work faster. He noticed that words sometimes moved on the page and that his teacher had to explain things to him more than once.

But what he didn’t see, what no child struggling in school immediately sees, was his brilliance, creativity, and unique way of thinking.

The Emotional Toll of Feeling Different

Feeling different can be isolating for children. Studies show that without support, children who struggle in school are more likely to experience anxiety, frustration, and even withdrawal from learning.

When a child asks, "Why am I different?" they are not just looking for an answer; they are looking for reassurance that they are enough. That their differences are not something to be ashamed of but something to be understood and embraced.

This is why representation in books, media, and education is so important. If children do not see themselves reflected in the stories they read, the lessons they learn, or the successes celebrated around them, they start to believe that success is not for them.

Why I Wrote Emily’s Unique Melody

As a parent and someone who has walked this path myself, I wanted to create a book that would help children like Harry feel seen.

Emily’s Unique Melody tells the story of a young girl with dyslexia who discovers her own special way of learning and thriving. She doesn’t just overcome her struggles, she learns to embrace her strengths.

Through Emily’s journey, I want children to understand that differences do not define their worth. Struggling in school does not mean they are failing; they are more than their challenges.

I want every child who feels out of place to know:

?? They are not alone. ?? Their struggles do not define them. ?? Their strengths matter just as much as their challenges.

How We Can Help Children Feel Seen

If we want to support neurodivergent children, we need to do more than just acknowledge their struggles; we need to actively show them that they belong.

1?? Talk openly about differences. When children express frustration or self-doubt, acknowledge their feelings and help them reframe the narrative. Instead of “I’m not good at this,” help them say, “I learn in a different way.”

2?? Ensure representation in books and media. Children’s books should reflect all kinds of learners, thinkers, and dreamers. If children see themselves in stories, they can start to believe in their own potential.

3?? Encourage strengths, not just struggles. Instead of focusing only on what children find difficult, highlight what they do well. Creativity, problem-solving, and resilience are just as valuable as test scores.

4?? Advocate for inclusive learning environments. Schools should provide multiple ways for children to learn and express their knowledge. A one-size-fits-all education system leaves too many behind.

A Message for Every Child Who Feels Different

To every child who wonders why they are different, to every parent who has held their child close after a tough day at school, know this:

Your child’s story is still being written. And just like Emily in Emily’s Unique Melody, they are learning, growing, and discovering their own kind of brilliance.

Being different is not a weakness; it is a strength. And the world needs more children who think, dream, and create in ways others cannot.

If my book can help just one child like Harry feel seen, then I know I’ve done something right.

?? You can find Emily’s Unique Melody On Amazon.

Let’s show every child that they belong. ??