This is why employees are less engaged: Improve retention by one slight change in communication strategy.

This is why employees are less engaged: Improve retention by one slight change in communication strategy.

What if I told you that the secret to increased employee engagement and retention isn't more money or more perks but simply better communication?

There's one belief about communication that is inaccurate.

And it drives employee engagement to the ground.

It's common among management to think that communication is more logical than emotional.

A typical managerial approach is driving results.

It's more about actions and less about emotions.?

As a result, the relationships with employees stagnate.

And in the absence of strong relationships, the risk of conflict increases.

These hidden conflicts make retention way harder than it should be.

People don't quit their jobs.

They quit weak relationships.

How can managers be effective in both results and relationships?

According to research by Albert Mehrabian,?only about 7% of our message comes from the words we use, the logical part.?

The rest, a staggering 93%, is conveyed through nonverbal cues like our tone of voice, facial expression, and body language - the emotional part.

Typically managers don't focus on it.

They don't have time to deal with these emotional matters.

They are put in their positions to drive results.

And often, they achieve results on the expense relationships.

Even in 1:1 meetings, managers often care more about work status rather than what's going on with their subordinates.

Typically, after a 5-minutes small talk, another 55 minutes is about progress status and next steps.

At most, managers apply some "patch solutions" for building relationships, such as:

  • Infrequent social events and happy hours
  • Informal meetings congratulating people on anniversaries and introducing new members
  • Once or twice a year, corporate events

These social settings are only slightly efficient and don't grant strong connections between people.

Even then, at corporate events, managers could be abrasive and discouraging.

I witnessed a senior manager say to an employee at a corporate event: "Aren't you supposed to be back at your desk?"

This shows that even at social gatherings, there's room for conflicts.

Social events are not solutions.?

They are just better conditions to apply communication skills.

However, these short-term solutions ignore a fundamental mismatch in expectations.

Managers expect certain character traits from their people: perseverance, grit, tenacity, resilience, and focus.

Unfortunately, not all employees possess them.

As a result, managers expect more from employees than practical.

On the other hand, employees expect different things from managers: patience, understanding, interest, engagement in their careers, and even support for their success.

Do all the managers offer it?

Unfortunately, managers are often busy, focused on their careers, stressed, and defensive of their time.

This results in a hidden ongoing conflict between expectations and reality.

One key to resolving this conflict lies in the quality many modern companies are starting to appreciate more: emotional intelligence.

According to an?Inc. magazine article,?

"Companies are placing a high value on people with EQ for several reasons that lead to competitive advantage."

Emotional intelligence is a skill and a practice leading to stronger relationships and better employee engagement.

And its success is rooted in accounting emotions to uncover the gaps in expectations and hidden conflicts.

One of the essential aspects is understanding of two-folded nature of our communication.

During communication, we send dual messages at the same time: logical and emotional.

They always come together, no exceptions:

  • Logical message: the words we say
  • Emotional message: How we say it and how we look when we say it.?

The emotional message includes:

  • tone of voice,?
  • fascial expression,?
  • body language,?
  • the pace of conversation,?
  • pauses,?
  • breathing,?
  • eye contact

Understanding logical messages could be difficult.

But the emotional message is not possible to perceive logically.?

It's too much information to process for our "logical human brain" simultaneously.

Instead, we feel it.

Our "mammal brain" is working much faster than our "human logical brain."

That's why we don't perceive how we send and receive emotional messages.

It happens automatically and subconsciously.

How can we control it?

Here's one thing that comes to help:?

Stories.

The story you tell yourself about your employees determines your emotional message.

Therefore be sure you are telling yourself a good story before you talk to someone.

Otherwise, you won't help it but will convey your emotions consistently with your internal story.

And be sure it will be interpreted perfectly on the other side through feelings.

A good story will create openness and connection.

A bad story will create defensiveness and will impact relationships.

So be sure to put love in your heart even if you're about to deliver the most challenging logical message.

And when you see emotions on their side, always wonder, what story is running through their head?

Ask your employees about it to learn more about where their emotions are coming from.

This will be empathetic, respectful, and inclusive.

Reflect on their emotions. Repeat back to them what they are feeling and why.

It will create a feeling of being heard and understood.?

You'll connect on that and deepen your relationships.

And it's exactly what your people seek from you, their leader.

To summarize, what could be put into practice starting this Monday?

Practice reflective listening: specifically on an emotional level.

On 1:1, don't talk about status.?

Talk about aspirations, values, principles, and experiences to recognize emotions and understand their source.

Then you'll be more aware, more connected, and admired by your people.

Emotions are data, not distractions.?

Learn to interpret them, and you'll be a trusted leader with many loyal employees.

--

Join my next LinkedIn event (Aug 7th):

"Transforming Emotional Intelligence into Negotiation Superpower"

Sign up for Master Class (Aug 17th): "7 Levels of Nurturing"


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#businessrelationships?#leadership?#influence?#communication #coaching

Howard Busch

Retired Chaplain (USA) | MDiv, BASc

1 年

Excellent information and insight!

Jené Lee LSSBB, PMP

PROFIT/LOSS CONSULTANT Helping LARGE COMPANIES to SUPERCHARGE their EMPLOYEES to become ORGANIZATIONAL LEADERS that drive PROCESS IMPROVEMENT and INNOVATION to INCREASE company PROFITS EXPONENTIALLY ??????

1 年

Yes, Vladimir. Communication about how to make your employees' job easier, like implementing an employee feedback box. Employee morale will increase as employee engagement increases.

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