Why Do You Do What You Do: The Power of Values

“Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words, Your words become your actions, Your actions become your habits, Your habits become your values, Your values become your destiny.” ― Gandhi

Introduction

I was inspired by a heartwarming story of aerograms (letters) shared between a daughter in London and her parents in Australia, as recounted in a Sunday Magazine. This article explores the timeless essence of love and legacy through values. These letters, spanning 60 years, not only narrate a story of enduring love but also prompt us to consider the often overlooked significance of our core values in today's fast-paced world.

As we navigate the complexities of today’s fast-paced world, one might ponder if we’ve allowed the essence of our values to fade into the background. Have we become so ensnared in the web of modernity that we’ve lost sight of what truly anchors us?

Why Values Are Important

Values are the compass that navigates us through life’s journey, influencing our choices and actions in profound ways. They serve as the foundation upon which we build our character and interact with the world around us. It is through our values that we find purpose, drive, and a sense of belonging.

Consider the example of a retired school teacher whose enduring commitment leads her to visit her former students in hospitals long after their graduation. Her actions, dictated by deep-seated values of compassion and loyalty, highlight how foundational values influence our daily lives and ripple through communities, fostering a legacy of kindness and respect.

"To understand the role of values in personal development and societal norms, it is crucial to recognize that they form the bedrock of our ethical compass," explains Dr. Susan Bright, a psychologist specializing in human behavior.

Dr. Bright's insight aligns with the notion that values influence every aspect of our lives, from personal decisions to broader societal interactions. Additionally, Dr. Jason Mallory, a cultural historian, notes that "the evolution of values reflects the narrative of humanity itself, a continuous adaptation to our ever-changing social, economic, and technological landscapes."

What are Values?

At their core, values are the guiding principles that dictate what we hold dear and steer our moral compass. They are the silent affirmations we make to ourselves about what is right, just, and worthy of pursuit.

Values are deeply personal yet universally understood, forming an unspoken bond between us all. They manifest in different ways for each person due to our unique personalities.

For the individual, it is not just following social conventions or mores.

Values such as honesty, integrity, and compassion are not just lofty ideals; they are practical signposts that direct our daily interactions and decisions. They shape our responses to life’s challenges and triumphs, and they colour the legacy we choose to leave behind.

For instance, consider the value of honesty in action: A cashier at a busy store notices a customer has dropped a wallet. Without hesitation, she safeguards it until she can return it to its rightful owner. This simple act of honesty reverberates trust and integrity within the community.

Or take integrity: A business owner faces financial pressure but refuses to cut corners or compromise on the quality of his products.?His commitment to integrity may not be the easiest financial path, but it earns him the respect and loyalty of his customers and employees.

And compassion: A teenager stands up for a bullied classmate, not because he seeks recognition but because his value of compassion compels him to act. This act of kindness fosters a culture of empathy and support within the school.

To reiterate, values are the fundamental beliefs and principles that dictate what is important to us.

They are the foundation of our actions and the lens through which we view the world. Common values include honesty, integrity, compassion, and respect—traits that are universally revered yet often challenging to consistently uphold.

Books like "Living a Values-Based Life" emphasise that actively recognising and nurturing these values can lead to more purposeful and satisfying life experiences.

Historical Perspectives on Values

The evolution of societal values reflects significant cultural and technological shifts. From the agrarian societies to today’s digital age, each period in history has its own set of values shaped by prevailing circumstances and challenges.

Understanding these historical shifts, as discussed in "First Principle & First Values," can provide insights into why certain values emerge or decline, helping us appreciate the dynamic nature of what we hold important.

One of the most potent examples of living by strong values is Nelson Mandela, whose commitment to justice and equality withstood nearly three decades of imprisonment. His unwavering integrity and respect for human dignity not only reshaped a nation but also inspired countless individuals around the globe to uphold these timeless values in their own lives and communities.

Contrasting with Mandela's positive legacy, the Enron scandal serves as a cautionary tale of how disregarding core values of honesty and accountability can lead to disastrous outcomes. The company's fall demonstrated the vital importance of corporate ethics and the destructive consequences when they are ignored, providing a crucial lesson in the necessity of values in business practices.

Values in a Changing World

As the world evolves at an unprecedented pace, the question arises: do our values change along with it? The answer is both yes and no. While core values such as honesty, respect, and kindness remain timeless, the way we express and prioritize these values may shift as society changes.

In a digital age where our lives are increasingly online, values like privacy and authenticity gain new significance. The decisions we make about what to share and how to interact on social media are guided by these values, reflecting our adaptation to a changing landscape.

Moreover, global challenges such as climate change and social inequality bring values like sustainability and justice to the forefront of public consciousness. These issues demand that we reassess our values and make decisions that contribute to a more equitable and resilient world.

Yet, despite these changes, the essence of our values remains constant.

While some values remain constant, our life experiences can modify or refine them. They continue to be the bedrock upon which we build our identities and communities. It is not that our values change, but rather that we find new ways to apply them in a changing world.

Take, for instance, the value of community in the context of a global pandemic. Physical distancing has transformed how we express this value, leading to innovative forms of connection such as virtual gatherings and support networks.

Another example could be someone who initially prioritises wealth over all else in his / her younger years, may find his values shifting towards empathy and generosity after engaging in volunteer work. This transformation illustrates that our core principles can evolve, influenced by life’s varied experiences as explored in the book "From Values to Action."

How to Identify and Develop Your Values

Identifying and developing your values is a journey of self-discovery and introspection. It requires you to look inward and reflect on what truly matters to you. Here are some steps to help you on this path:

1. Reflect on Influential Experiences: Think about moments in your life especially your early years that have shaped who you are. What values were present or absent in these situations? How did they impact your decisions?
2. Consider the People You Admire: Who are the role models in your life? What values do they embody that resonate with you? These can be indicators of values you already hold or aspire to cultivate.
3. Assess Your Daily Choices: Observe the choices you make on a daily basis. What do these choices say about what you value? This can help you identify patterns and core values that guide your actions.
4. Define Your Values: Once you have a clearer understanding, articulate your values. Write them down and consider what each value means to you and how it shows up in your life.
5. Set Goals Aligned with Your Values: Create goals that reflect your values. This ensures that your actions are congruent with what you stand for, leading to a more authentic and fulfilling life.
6. Practise Mindfulness: Stay present and mindful of how your values guide your interactions with others and the decisions you make. This helps reinforce and deepen your commitment to those values.
7. Be Open to Growth: As you grow and change, so might your understanding of certain values. Be open to this evolution, as it is a natural part of personal development.

For example, if you identify ‘learning’ as a core value, you might set a goal to read one new book each month or take up a course that interests you. This deliberate action not only develops your value of learning but also enriches your life experience.

Remember, values are not just about what we claim to believe; they are reflected in our everyday actions. By identifying and developing your values, you create a life that is not only meaningful but also a true reflection of who you are.

Living Your Values in Everyday Life

Living your values is about bringing them to life through your actions and choices every single day. It’s about making a conscious effort to align your behavior with what you believe in, even when it’s challenging. Here are some ways to live your values in everyday life:

1. Make Value-Based Decisions: When faced with decisions, big or small, ask yourself which option best aligns with your values. This practice ensures that your actions are consistent with your principles.
2. Speak Up for What You Believe In: Don’t be afraid to voice your opinions and stand up for your values. Whether it’s in a personal conversation or a public forum, expressing your values can inspire others and effect change.
3. Create Value-Centered Habits: Build daily habits that reflect your values. For instance, if you value health, incorporate exercise into your routine. If you value learning, set aside time each day to read or explore new ideas.
4. Seek Out Like-Minded Individuals: Surround yourself with people who share similar values. This supportive community can encourage you to stay true to your beliefs and provide a sense of belonging.
5. Volunteer Your Time: Give back to causes that resonate with your values. Volunteering is a powerful way to put your values into action and make a positive impact on the world.
6. Reflect on Your Actions: Regularly reflect on your actions and assess whether they align with your values. This self-reflection can help you stay on track and make adjustments as needed.

For example, if ‘community’ is one of your core values, you might choose to volunteer at a local food bank or organise neighborhood events. These actions not only serve others but also reinforce your commitment to fostering community spirit.

Living your values isn’t always easy, but it’s deeply rewarding. It gives purpose to our actions and integrity to our lives. By consistently applying our values, we not only better ourselves but also contribute to a more ethical and compassionate society.

Challenges and Conflicts of Values

Living according to one’s values is not without its challenges. At times, we may find ourselves in situations where our values are tested or even in conflict with one another. Here’s how to navigate these challenges:

1. Prioritise Your Values: Sometimes, you may face situations where you can’t fully honour all your values. In such cases, prioritise which values are most important to you and make decisions that reflect those priorities.
2. Seek Compromise: When your values conflict with others’, look for a middle ground that respects both sides. Compromise doesn’t mean abandoning your values; it means finding a solution that aligns as closely as possible with what you stand for.
3. Reflect on the Bigger Picture: Consider the long-term implications of your decisions. Sometimes, upholding a value in the short term may conflict with your long-term goals or values.
4. Be Prepared to Make Tough Choices: Upholding your values?may sometimes require difficult decisions, such as leaving a job or ending a relationship. Be prepared to make these choices if they align with your core values.
5. Learn from Conflicts: Use conflicts as opportunities to learn more about your values and how they interact with the world around you. Reflect on these experiences to strengthen your understanding and commitment to your values.

For instance, if you value both honesty and kindness, you might struggle with whether to give tough feedback to a friend. In such cases, consider how you can be honest in a compassionate way, thus honoring both values.

Navigating the challenges and conflicts of values is an integral part of personal growth. It requires courage, reflection, and sometimes, the willingness to stand alone. But the integrity that comes from living in alignment with your values is worth the effort.

Embracing Values in a Rapidly Changing World

In a world that’s constantly evolving, our values serve as a compass, guiding our decisions and shaping our actions. While the expression of our values may adapt to new circumstances, their essence remains unchanged, providing us with a sense of identity and purpose.

We’ve explored the importance of identifying and developing our values through self-reflection, admiration for role models, and mindful daily choices. Setting goals aligned with our values ensures that we lead lives that are not only meaningful but also authentic.

Living our values in everyday life involves making value-based decisions, creating habits that reflect our principles, and finding community among like-minded individuals. Volunteering and speaking up for what we believe in are tangible ways to put our values into action.

However, living by our values is not without its challenges. Conflicts may arise, requiring us to prioritize, compromise, and sometimes make tough choices. These moments test our commitment to our values but also offer opportunities for growth and learning.

In summary, our values are dynamic forces that evolve with us. They anchor us to our past while propelling us into the future. By embracing our values, we navigate life with integrity and contribute to a more ethical and compassionate society.

All the best in your endeavours!

Frank Choy

5 May 2024

Recommended reading:

"Living a Values Based Life", Robert McPhee, Excellent Decisions, 2024 - Discover, Clarify and Live in Alignment with Your Highest Values.

"The Values Factor", John F DeMartini, Penguin, 2013 - The Secret to Creating an Inspired and Fulfilling Life

"First Principles and First Values", David J Temple, Marc Gafni, World Philosophy & Religion Press, 2024 -