WHY do you AVOID giving Performance FEEDBACK?

Have you ever wondered why every time you need to give performance feedback to one of your team members or engage in a difficult conversation, you experience anxiety and high levels of stress?

Perhaps you notice symptoms like increased heart rate, shallow breathing, muscle tension, sweating, or even nausea because you're:?

• Concerned about damaging your relationship with your direct reports by delivering negative feedback. Fearing potential defensiveness or resentment.
• Fearful of Conflict, you're uncomfortable with confrontation and drama.
• Pressured to Perform, at least that's how you feel. "You need to act like the Boss" and still bring out the best in your team.

While it's natural to want to avoid difficult conversations, addressing conflict is essential for personal and professional growth for you and your team.

Overcoming this fear can lead to better resolution of issues and stronger relationships within the team.

Avoiding difficult conversations is a problem, I have seen and experienced this issue more than I would like to admit.

In my years in Civil Service tenure through corporate and later as a leadership consultant working with leaders in corporate and small businesses, in different parts of the world, IT'S A PROBLEM across countries, cultures, and even genders.

For example, one of my clients had an employee who was continuously late with a disruptive attitude with his team. He seldom met his goals, but he had not received a formal reprimand or a write-up. All the other employees witnessed this train wreck and wondered when the behavior would be addressed. Nothing was happening until the HR Director hired us to help the manager.

In short, the manager didn't feel comfortable addressing negative feedback and was terrified to engage in difficult conversations. She was placed in that position because of her expertise, not because of her Leadership skills.

We have been working with Sally, the manager for a couple of weeks and we already have seen great improvements. She reluctantly grasped the strategies and owned her personal leadership.

Feedback needs to be a continuous process, we should not wait until the Yearly Performance Review to come around before we decide to communicate with our staff.

Remember, Sharing feedback positive or negative should not be relegated to a yearly performance appraisal. If the yearly performance review is the first time one of your direct reports has heard about an issue, then you're not doing your job as the boss.?

I want to share with you one of the tools we use with our clients, a checklist that will assist you in conducting performance improvement meetings.

This proactive approach can empower you to navigate difficult conversations more confidently and effectively, ultimately leading to better outcomes for the employee and the team.?

As the boss, it's your responsibility to ensure that performance issues are addressed promptly rather than allowing them to escalate or remain unresolved until a formal appraisal.?

Here's my comprehensive checklist for leading an effective feedback session:

I. Prepare for the Discussion:

• Choose a Suitable Environment: Select a quiet and private location conducive to open discussion. Decide whether the meeting will be held face-to-face or via Zoom, ensuring all participants are comfortable with the chosen method.
• Schedule the Meeting: Arrange a time that works for both parties, allowing for adequate time to address the feedback thoroughly. Send out calendar invites with clear details about the meeting purpose and duration.

II. During the Meeting:

• Set the Tone: Start by establishing a positive and respectful atmosphere. Emphasize the confidentiality of the discussion and reassure the employee that their feedback is valued.
• Sare the Big Picture: Provide context by outlining the overall goals and objectives relevant to the feedback being given. Be tactful in your approach, focusing on constructive criticism rather than personal attacks.
• Take Notes: Inform the employee early on that you'll be taking notes to ensure important points are captured accurately. This demonstrates active engagement and commitment to addressing their concerns.
• Focus on Problem Resolution: Keep the conversation centered on identifying and resolving the specific issues at hand. Encourage the employee to share their perspective and collaborate on finding solutions.
• Offer Clear Guidance: Provide actionable feedback and guidance on how the employee can improve or address the identified areas of concern. Offer resources or support to assist them in implementing changes effectively.
• Make it a Two Way Conversation: Foster an open dialogue by encouraging the employee to express their thoughts and feelings. Practice focused listening to ensure their concerns are fully understood and addressed.
• Ask for Final Questions: Before concluding the discussion, inquire if the employee has any remaining questions or clarifications they'd like to discuss.

III. Follow-up:

• Set Up Next Meeting: Schedule a follow-up meeting to review progress and provide ongoing support. Confirm the date and time before concluding the current session. Take out your calendar and agree on the date and time. Don't have your direct report to leave until you complete this process.
• Express Gratitude: Thank the employee for their openness and willingness to engage in the feedback process. Acknowledge their efforts and commitment to improvement.
• Close the Meeting: Summarize the key points discussed and any action items agreed upon. Reiterate the confidentiality of the conversation and reassure the employee of your continued support.

By following this comprehensive checklist, you can effectively lead feedback sessions that promote growth, development, and positive workplace relationships.

I would love to hear how it worked for you and your team.