Why Do We Need Acceptance?

"When you do things for yourself, not for the approval or satisfaction of others, you'll attract the people who matter."

As a 40-year-old man, I was angry, frustrated, and desperately alone despite being surrounded by friends and family. Why? Because all I wanted or could think about was having the approval of everyone around me, I could never get enough.

We seek approval from outside sources when we only care about pleasing other people. Our value is purely derived from the acceptance of others.

Whenever we reach for something in the outside world to give us what we should give ourselves, we set ourselves up for great disappointment.

We set ourselves up to live a life we don't want, but as long as we believe we're gaining the approval of others, we'll do whatever people expect of us.

We don't dare take a chance on something that may bring a disapproving stare or risk falling on the social status meter. We do what's expected of us, and we do what others want from us, and in return, we get their approval.

So, you might be thinking, what is the price we pay for needing everyone else's approval?

Belief in yourself is more important than endless worries about what others think of you. Value yourself, and others will value you. Validation is best when it comes from within. - Ng?g? wa Thiong'o

Loss of Self-Esteem

For one, it leads to a loss of self-esteem and self-worth. When we rely on the approval and validation of others to feel good about ourselves, we give away the power and control over our happiness.

We become dependent on the opinions and beliefs of others, which can be very fickle and ever-changing.

Sacrificing Your Values

Furthermore, the need for acceptance forces you to sacrifice your values and beliefs to fit in with certain groups or maintain a specific image. This kind of conformity leads to hollow and unfulfilled relationships as you deny your true self to please others.

Fear of Rejection

The search for acceptance also leads to a fear of rejection, which can negatively impact your relationships and social interactions. This fear will cause you to avoid taking risks or trying new things as you become overly concerned about how people perceive you and fear rejection.

This will seriously limit your opportunities and prevent you from experiencing the full spectrum of life that is out there to be enjoyed.

Disappointment and Hurt

Finally, relying on the approval of others leads to experiencing disappointment and hurt. Not everyone will like or accept you, so we must learn to cultivate self-acceptance and self-love.

When we put ourselves first, we build a strong foundation of self-confidence that is immune to the opinions of others.

Conclusion

"Master the art of self-love, and you will never have to seek validation ever again." - Anjum Choudhary

The need for acceptance is hazardous to our mental health. It can damage our self-worth, lead to conformity, create a fear of rejection, limit our opportunities, and cause heartache and disappointment.

Instead of seeking acceptance from others, we should cultivate self-love and build our confidence from within.

We can lead fulfilling and authentic lives by prioritizing our needs and desires and making them our priority daily.

v