Why dating has become harder for 25-34-years-old male professionals

I remember being told: “if you are a good man and work on your goals, the right woman will come”.?

Now more than ever, for most men this theory seems to reveal its limitations.?

The General Social Survey reports that the percentage of sexless men almost tripled from 2008 to 2018 [1].

Among men aged 25 to 34 years, sexual inactivity rose to 14.1% from 7.0% in 2000: it literally doubled [2].

Interestingly, the same increase is not registered for women, for which the curve undergoes small variations during the same time span.?

In other words, the same number of women is now "accessible" to a smaller number of men.??

This trend correlates with the advent of 2 technologies that impacted the dating landscape.?

You guessed it.

Dating apps and social media disrupted the traditional dating scene.?

Users have been able to increase their exposure to the world dramatically.???

If Joe wants to date Jenny, he will now have to compete not only with a bunch of guys in her social circle but with men reaching out to her on the Internet.?

The million-dollar question is: what is the ground on which men are competing?

This is where things get juicy.?

Higher education seems to have a minimal influence on this scenario, as reported by the General Social Survey [1].

And if your guess was the physical appearance, you will be surprised.?

Recent online surveys of more than 1,000 women between the ages of 21 and 54 (one was conducted by Princeton, New Jersey’s opinion Research Corporation; the other was done on BestLifeOnline.com) found that women value personality far more than physical attractiveness [3].

If personality is the ground on which we are playing, why do many men with interests, values, and a sense of humor fail at dating??

The truth is - having personality and being able to convey that in an authentic and attractive way are 2 very different things.?

When I coach my clients, I see this all the time.

They are people with degrees, goals, interests, and even a good dose of sense of humor, but they are not effective at communicating it.?

And when they are, it’s often not in a way that is attractive from a female perspective.?

Their product is good, but their marketing is off.?

And - as cliche as it might sound - first impressions matter.?

The good news is - communication in dating is a skill that can be learned, and that is absolutely non-dependent on genetics and personality.?

In such a competitive landscape, learning how to stand out through your communication looks like the most effective solution to break through the noise and connect with the right person.

What do you think of these trends? Do you feel there are other variables affecting the dating landscape?

Looking forward to reading your thoughts.

Also, if you are curious to learn more about how you can find the right partner by improving your communication skills, I’ve just recorded a video on the topic.?

Connect with me and message me the word “communication” to get it for free.??

Take care, ?your Mentor

Marco

Sources:

[1] General Social Survey (GSS), 2018.

[2] Ueda P, Mercer CH, Ghaznavi C, Herbenick D. Trends in Frequency of Sexual Activity and Number of Sexual Partners Among Adults Aged 18 to 44 Years in the US, 2000-2018.

[3] Princeton, New Jersey’s opinion Research Corporation and BestLifeOnline.com.