Why can’t I do anything write?
*right! Doh!
Does a harsh inner critic have a permanent residency in your mind? Despite working hard and constantly pushing yourself, that incessant voice rears up whispering, "Yes, but why can't I ever do anything right?"
Even highly successful professionals can get caught in mental loops of harsh self-judgment and unrealistic expectations. You might even say that it is those who are most high achieving can be the hardest on themselves at times. It can be easy to review past decisions with a critical eye, nitpick at minor flaws and fixate on perceived shortcomings.
Rather than allowing ourselves to metabolise accomplishments, we get mired in a perfectionistic mindset that moves the goal post. We hold ourselves to lofty and unsustainable standards, leaving us feeling chronically inadequate.
This negative self-talk takes a toll over time - it fuels anxiety, erodes self-confidence, and saps motivation and enjoyment from life. It alienates us from the inherent "enoughness" within. So where does this tendency arise from and how can we overcome its grip? This week's intention explores self-compassion as an antidote.
Got a question? Send in those burning self development questions that have been praying on your mind and I will be unpacking one each month, here! Simply hit reply to this email ??
My Intention for the Week: Nurture Self-Compassion
Self-compassion is the principle of treating ourselves with the same kindness, care and understanding that we would a beloved friend. It's ok to be imperfect, to accept our challenges and extend compassion rather than harsh judgment.
This week, let's bring more self-compassion into our daily lives through a simple practice. Whenever you notice self-critical thoughts arising ("I'm just not good enough", "I blew that presentation", "Why can't I ever get this right?!"), pause to reframe it.
As cliche as it sounds, would you speak to a friend that way? Of course not. You would remind them of their worth and strengths with empathy and support.
So offer that same kindness inwardly. Place a hand over your heart and try responding with understanding: "This is really difficult right now, and I'm doing my best. It doesn't mean I'm inadequate - I'm human."
Slowly breathe into that self-nurturing moment. Notice the relief and acceptance it provides in contrast to self-citicism.
It takes regular practice, but over time we can build an inner voice of supportive wisdom rather than unrealistic demands.
Looking for support?
You can work with me directly for therapy or career coaching
OR
Your employer can sign up to work with the balabe team where we offer;
Or maybe you want to support others to unpack…
?? Forward this email to someone you think will enjoy reading it