Who's Driving?

Navigating a tough leadership challenge is like going for a drive with an intense emotion.? In one scenario, your emotion shoves you into the backseat and takes the wheel.? Each turn you make is controlled by your emotion, and you are simply forced to go along for the ride.? This scenario is common in the workplace, with emotions like frustration and anxiety controlling actions - the colleague who storms out of a meeting, or the employee who is so afraid of messing up that they never take initiative.?

In another scenario, you lock your emotion up in the trunk of the car and get in the driver’s seat.? Although you are in control of each turn, you are distracted by your emotion, who is pounding on the door and trying to get out.? This is probably the most common scenario I see with my clients - the employee who hesitates to raise questions about a gap in a process, or the manager who tries to accommodate the needs of a direct report at their own expense.? They tolerate suboptimal situations, and eventually burn out.?

The best scenario is where you are in the driver’s seat, but invite your emotion to sit in the passenger seat.? You stay in control of the wheel, but are explicitly aware, respectfully accepting, and acting alongside of your emotion.? Leaders who nurture this kind of healthy relationship with their emotions are willing to open up about their mistakes, give direct but empathetic feedback, engage in conflict with curiosity and don’t sugar coat tough situations. They don’t deny emotions a place at work, but they don’t let them wreak havoc either.??

Emotions ride shotgun.