Who are you, really?

Who are you?

If you were asked that question, what would your immediate response be?

Naturally, your answer might lead you to your job, business, family, hobbies, religion, where you come from or your successes.

But none of the above is who you are. Only roles that you play.

In my professional life, I play the role of a Coach, a Professional Speaker, a former Sales Rep who has worked for blue-chip healthcare companies, an ex Area Director of Toastmasters and a Graduate with a degree in Chemistry.

In my personal life I play the role of a Father, a Husband, a Son, a Brother and a Friend.

Looking beyond that, I play the role of a third-generation Asian, a Muslim, an introvert, someone with a passion for reading books and an avid football fan (for my sins, I support Arsenal!)

But it doesn’t define me.

The person that I am is beyond that.

And the person that you are is beyond that too.

Who you are determines how you play the various roles in your life.

The real you

What we experience in the game of life is less about what we do and more about who we are.

Throughout our lifetime, we will likely meet many people who do what we do or have what we have.

Our identity lies underneath what we do or what we have.

It lies in our values and what we believe to be true.

You might have heard the word values pop up time and time again, but what does it actually mean?

For me, it’s simply what you believe to be important to you, what you place importance on.

More often than not, it's not something that needs to be found, only uncovered.

Deep down, beneath the negative experiences you have been through and the people that influenced you the most, rests your true values.

What’s getting in the way of being the real you?

Analysing your language is a great starting point to discover what's stopping you from being yourself.

The phrases “I have to” and “I should” make us feel routed in a specific way of thinking.

It makes us feel compelled to remain a certain way.

Every concept you have about your identity or personality is simply a product of your thinking.

And if that is the case, who you show up as, is a product of your decisions.

‘You’ is the space between thinking you are something and doing something.

Stephen Covey talks about response-ability, the ability to choose.

When you take responsibility for your thoughts and let go of the crutches and excuses that keep you rooted to a specific identity, that's when you can change.

Quite often, that thinking that gets in the way of us taking positive action is fear.

But beyond that fear lies the possibility of the new you.

Or the real you before life events made you think you had to be someone different.

Who do you want to be?

Everything is created twice – first in the mind and then again in reality.?

Once you see that your identity is impermanent, you can choose to create yourself totally differently if that’s what you want.

You could walk into a room with completely new people and choose to be an introvert. This could lead to people not getting to know the real you. It could prevent you from creating your next big opportunity or achieving your next goal.

Or you could hold the space between the moment your thinking demands you to be an introvert and choose to be someone different. You could decide to be proactive in approaching new people. Or to allow your true personality to shine without fear of judgement or criticism from others.

The same principle holds true to any aspect of your personality - it is temporary not permanent!

Commitment

Making any meaningful change is difficult.

During the process of change, the old voice might return from time to time. And that’s ok. When we are committed to being a higher version of ourselves, the old voice can have little or no effect.

You are the decisions you make, the commitments you hold and the person you want to be.

And the most significant commitment that we can make during the process of reinventing ourselves is to not be our old thinking. To react to whatever our mind tells us to be true and instead decide to be someone differen

Make a promise and keep it. Set a goal and achieve it. Say something, then do it!

Practice makes perfect

The beauty of being alive is that you have the freedom to choose.

And that choice gives you control over who you want to be.

You don't have to increase your confidence or motivation, or self-esteem first.

You simply need to get started and gradually build the habit of being the change you want to create.

What might begin as something that requires conscious effort and attention will eventually become effortless..

How would you like to reinvent yourself?

The process of shedding away elements of your identity that no longer serve you doesn't have to be daunting.

It can be fun.

Knowing what you want to change, committing to the process of being different to what your old thinking is telling you, along with the creation of new habits that will arise through consistency can bring more fun and excitement in your life.

Who would you like to be next?

In case you are interested, I am opening up my coaching practice to 4 new clients looking to reinvent themselves in the areas of; Career, Business, Self-Confidence or Relationships.

If you are committed to making a change in any one of these areas, then I am happy to gift you 90 minutes of my time to discuss your goal in more depth.

You can book a time into my calendar using the link below:

https://calendly.com/mkcareersolutions/creating-the-new-you