Who is Showing Up When You Date — Your Wounded Feminine Energy or Your Empowered Feminine Queen Energy?

When it comes to dating and relationships, who is truly showing up? Is it your confident, radiant, empowered feminine energy that attracts love and commitment effortlessly? Or is it your wounded feminine energy, driven by fear, scarcity, and old beliefs that keep you stuck in the same frustrating patterns?

If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve experienced the highs and lows of modern dating. You’ve met men who seemed promising at first, only to pull away when things started to get serious. You may have wondered why, despite your best efforts, you keep attracting men who are emotionally unavailable or inconsistent. Here’s the hard truth: the energy you bring to dating often reflects your inner beliefs about yourself, love, and relationships.

Wounded Feminine Energy: The Saboteur in Disguise

Wounded feminine energy operates from a place of fear, insecurity, and unworthiness. It’s the part of us that doubts whether we’re good enough, lovable enough, or deserving of the deep, soulful love we crave. This energy can manifest as neediness, over-giving, or tolerating behavior that doesn’t align with your values.

When you’re in this space, you might find yourself chasing after men who aren’t emotionally available or staying in situationships, hoping that with enough effort, he’ll finally commit. You may even accept crumbs of affection, believing that’s the best you can get.

But here’s the thing: when you’re dating from a wounded place, you’re not embodying your true feminine power. Instead, you’re operating from a lack mentality — one that tells you love is scarce, that men are hard to find, and that you have to compete or settle to get what you want.

When I was dating from my own wounded feminine energy and I wasn’t even aware of it, because we often are not aware of it, I found myself attracting and attracted to super toxic men, and I wish I was exaggerating. I was dating and had romantic feelings towards drug dealers, carnappers, broke unemployed men, etc. And I simply wasn’t attracted to gentleman who had proper jobs. I always found myself attracted to a man’s wounded stories of how their parents pdysically abused them or abandoned them. I would cry my eyes out when they would leave or we would break up or when they would cheat on me. The kind of artists I found attractive were Fetty Wap and Post Malone and their wounded lyrics.

As I’ve grown and healed, I just am no longer attracted to these men. And even when some of these men came back after some time, I just wasn’t attracted to them anymore. And when that happens to you too, that’s often a sign that you have grown or healed to some degree.

These men and situationships were just exactly what we needed for us to be aware of all those wounded self-worth mind programs that we were unconsciously running on.

So for that, I now have a lot of love, gratitude and compassion for all those Mr. What Was I Thinking or Mr. What Was I On? But I also have the wisdom and discernment to know now that they are not my soul-aligned King whom I have shared values with, or as the bible call it, “equally yoked with.”

Empowered Feminine Energy: The High-Value Queen Within

Contrast that with your Empowered Feminine Energy— the part of you that knows her worth, radiates confidence, and naturally draws in high-quality men. A woman in her empowered feminine energy doesn’t chase; she attracts. She doesn’t need to settle for less than she deserves because she knows that love is abundant, and her True King is out there.

When you’re in this energy, you trust that you are enough. You don’t over-give, overthink, or overcompensate because you know your value. You set boundaries that honor your self-worth, and you’re not afraid to walk away from anything that doesn’t align with the love you seek.

This is the energy that pulls in men who are serious, committed, and ready to invest in you. This is the energy of a high-value Queen — and it’s available to you right now, if you choose to embody it.

So, How Do You Shift from Wounded to Empowered Energy?

First, it starts with self-awareness. Ask yourself: What beliefs are driving your dating life? Are you operating from a place of fear, where you’re afraid of being alone or missing out? Are you clinging to outdated narratives about love, like “all men are players” or “I have to be perfect to be loved”? These are wounded beliefs that keep you stuck.

Second, start doing the inner work to heal those beliefs. This is where feminine energy healing and self-worth work come into play. When you heal the wounds that tell you you’re not good enough or that love is scarce, you begin to step into your power. You stop dating from a place of desperation and start dating from a place of abundance and confidence.

The Transformation: From Wounded Woman to Empowered Queen

Imagine walking into your next date fully grounded in your worth. You know who you are, what you want, and what you bring to the table. You’re not worried about whether he’ll call you back or if you’re “doing enough” to keep him interested. Instead, you’re present, open, and curious, letting the connection unfold naturally.

This is the transformation that happens when you move from wounded to empowered feminine energy. It’s the shift that will change not just your dating life, but every area of your life — because when you embody the high-value Queen within, you become magnetic. You don’t just attract love; you attract abundance, opportunities, and everything that aligns with your highest self.

Ready to Step Into Your Queen Energy?

If you’re ready to step out of your wounded feminine patterns and into your empowered Queen energy, I invite you to take the next step in your journey. My book, “Awaken the High-Value Queen Within: Heal Your Self-Worth, Embody Authentic Femininity, and Manifest Your True King,” is designed to guide you through this transformation.

Inside, you’ll discover how to: - Heal your core feminine wounds and break free from limiting beliefs. - Embody your authentic feminine power and radiate confidence. - Attract high-quality, emotionally available men who are ready to commit. - Manifest your True King — a partner who sees, honors, and cherishes you for who you truly are.

This is not just about finding love; it’s about becoming the woman who effortlessly attracts it.

Visit https://wynneljoycoling.com to learn more about my coaching programs and to get your copy of the book that will awaken the Queen within you.

Together, we rise. Thank you for you. I love you.