Who Rules Your World?

My daughter wants all my attention, all of the time.

DaddyDaddyDaddyDaddyDaddyDaddyDaddyDaddyDaddy. Daddy.

Daddy.

She has zero concept of all my other important priorities. She simply doesn’t care.

Will you play with me Daddy? Will you be the dog Daddy? Be a good dog Daddy?

I love my daughter, but can’t keep up with her demands. I feel sorry for her future husband!

Life, decisions, actions and people are like that to you too, if you let them. And yes, I let my daughter make demands of me. And my wife, it is a choice after all. But anyone else, they need to learn and respect your time, and you need to teach them, or they will teach you.

Do you master your time, or do other people have you running around all over the place? Are you focusing on important tasks to you, or urgent tasks for others? Are you task focused?

People think that other people make demands on and interrupt their time. But this ONLY happens if you let them. No one can do anything without your permission. It is time to take control and rule your own world, and own your tome and where you spend it. If you do things for others it is only because you choose to, or it is right or important to you.

It is time to retrain the world how to communicate with you. People are habitual, and so if they know they can get an email response, that you will pick up the phone at the drop of a hat, and that you will drop everything to assist them, then they will keep doing it habitually.

When you are focused on your KLAs, KRAs and IGTs:

1. Never answer the phone

(Unless it is a life or death emergency. You might want to wait until the 3rd attempt)

2. Never respond to an email

(No matter how quick or easy. You will break your flow, and get another two demands back)

3. Never book meetings that don’t work for your flow and energy

(Even if they demand it. Exception may be for a superstar you really want to meet)

4. Learn to say No

(‘Yes, but not now’. ‘I can’t now, can we schedule another time’? ‘Please ask (insert go to person) – they can help you better than I)

5. Have a PA, VA or online booking system book your calls and meetings

(And block out all the time you don’t do them, so they don’t even have the choice to book times that don’t work for you)

Sales calls, answering incoming calls, replying to emails, demands, other people\’s emergencies

6. Set times for meeting and calls

(Book 15 minute call and 30 minute meetings. If you don’t make them short, other people will make them long)

7. Turn on necessary out of offices and auto-responders

(Use automation to gently nudge back requests, and send them to someone else, including social media)

8. Have gatekeepers and processes for your income messages and requests

(Filter messages and requests to others and only allow KRA and IGT requests to come to you)

Set clear rules and processes, and then you have to stick to them. This is as much about retraining yourself as it is retraining the world. You don’t have to become cold doing this, you can still be personal.

I dedicate two hours a day to help people, respond to messages, give value on social media and podcasts and writing and all manner of ways. I like doing it so I’m not after a medal, but I feel that is a fair balance. It is a lot of my time, and sometimes I give more. And it’s OK to get my own important things done too.

I used to reply to every single message and request for years. I am glad I did, because now I can’t, so I did when I could. I get more than 300 messages a day on all media. Now I have given myself permission to set some equitable rules, to filter the requests and efficiently manage my time.

I give myself permission not to respond in these scenarios:

1. Task me something admin related that they could easily find themselves. I am not their cheap VA

2. If they are rude or entitled

3. If the message is too long

4. If they go in with the pitch too soon/NOT personal

5. If I can direct them to someone who can help them more

This has reduced my volume significantly, and actually gives me more time to assist the people who probably warrant it the most. I used to feel a lot of responsibility (and guilt) to help everyone, but this is simply not possible. And if you try, you end up resenting them, and that’s not their fault.

I also use a leverage technique of collating a lot of the common questions and challenges, and doing live videos and podcasts on them, so that I can help the individual and more people. I recently posted about how I feel guilty as an entrepreneur, too much time with family I feel some guilt around not getting work done, too much at work and guilt around not enough family time. I posted in my “Disruptive Entrepreneurs” community on Facebook, and a lot of people related to it. There was a deep, polarised discussion about it, and so I did a podcast episode on the subject. I’ve done the same for depression in business, how to be creative, how to be a content machine, and more.

To summarise this important chapter: retrain the world to respect your time and work around you. First think of all the things you can leverage, before you think of all the things you feel you have to do.

This chapter is taken from why new & upcoming book "Routine = Results" - how are you doing managing your time?

Rob Moore