Which Words? The Nuts and Bolts of Eloquence

Eloquence is lean. But I didn’t know that when I started speaking professionally. I used weighty language, and for the wrong reasons. In retrospect, my mistake was innocent. I am a woman and was often younger than my clients and audiences. My expertise was eclectically acquired; I had no degrees or designations to fortify surety in myself. So, I used three-dollar words to sound credible and smart. The more nervous I was, the more tiles disappeared from my scrabble bag.

A breakthrough came while a consultant was preparing me for a radio interview on conference design. In our practice session, I kept saying that the problem of using too much crammed-in content and too little space and downtime was systemic, and she kept saying the word systemic was inaccessible and prevented me from connecting with the audience. She was right, and that “a-ha” moment created a mental filter. Was I using a big word to sound big myself or to enjoy the beauty and power of language?

A little bell began to ring in my head when I used lavish words for the wrong reason. I learned to make impact without pomp and have found over many years that simplicity and brevity are harder. Does this mean we should shy away from using colorful or interesting words? Au contraire! But we must be sure our selections are mindful, and strive to elevate the message, not ourselves.

Beginning from a place of authenticity, and without flashy words, you can take steps every day to increase the power and resonance of each word you speak or write. Here are some of my favorite tips:

7 Stops on the Road to Eloquence

Cut that out: When striving for eloquence on paper, try to cut out the word “that” whenever you can. It is unnecessary 90% of the time.

Off your offspring: Writers often fall in love with their own words. But when it comes to editing, you must “kill your darlings.” Edit your writing for overkill, showing off, and repetition.

Upgrade your source: When it’s the right time to embellish, don’t stop with a thesaurus. I recommend The Synonym Finder by J.I. Rodale and Nancy LaRoche. This juicy tome is the word search difference between the corner hardware store and Home Depot.

Go easy on quotes: If you crave more splash in your words, slide decks, or reports, don’t borrow them too liberally to meet this need. Too many quotes in a presentation (either verbal or written) smacks of amateurishness.?

Drop the cookbook: I love to cook because it’s an opportunity for instinct and nuance. A good recipe partway through is abandoned, like a guidebook that at some point is tossed to the tour bus floor so you can run off and explore. The point is . . . Improvise as a writing exercise, then cautiously do so in your spoken presentations.

Identify your recipe: One more kitchen analogy before I go whip up a lemon Bundt cake so I can get back to concentrating. There are different flavors of eloquence. What is your unique eloquence recipe? A spoon of wisdom? A pinch of sweetness or sarcasm? Just a dash of subtlety?

Warm Up: If you’re writing for a presentation, why write it if your lips can’t say it? Even the most beautiful words need a warm, flexible vocal instrument to be heard. Try singing scales or humming a note, sliding up and down. Don’t forget the tongue twisters. My favorite is: “She stood on the balcony inimitably mimicking him, hiccupping and amicably welcoming him in.”

Welcome to 2022. Our young adults don’t know how to communicate unless they can type, and punctuation is becoming passé. We need every well-spoken, well-written syllable we can find. So don’t give up the fight. Carrying the torch of moving and relevant language is up to us—the speakers, the writers, and the occasional odd guy on a box in a public square.