Where are you stuck in the change cycle?

Have you ever faced a change and noticed that you started cycling back and force between inspiration in one moment and resistance the next?

Or you are certain about what you want and determined to go ahead and do whatever it takes to get it, but then you find yourself terrified of the change or you magically forgotten all about the thing you really wanted and you find yourself right where you started. STUCK.

What you have been experiencing is going through this cycle over and over again, on some issue at some point of your life. The truth is that it will continue to happen, until you stop the cycle.

This is how the cycle looks like:

Where are you stuck in the change cycle?

1. Discontent -you grow increasingly unhappy and discontent with an area of your life. You “hang in there,” tolerate, ignore, repress, or otherwise deal with the circumstance because it is comfortable and familiar, and you fear change.
2. Breaking Point -eventually your level of discontent builds high enough that you cannot take it anymore. You reach a “breaking point,” either through exhaustion or due to a dramatic event occurring that triggers the break.
3. Decision - you decide you’re ready to change and declare that you will no longer tolerate the undesirable situation. You take the first step toward change, giving you a short-lived sense of hope.
4. Fear - usually, shortly (or immediately) after your feelings of empowerment, you encounter your fear. You become uncomfortable and anxious about the idea of changing. You doubt your decision. Both options look bleak. You feel helpless, empty.
5. Amnesia - the fear of change grows strong enough that it makes the original situation look much better than you originally thought. You perceive the original situation as less anxiety-producing than the change. You’re used to it; it’s comfortable; it’s familiar. Plus, it has become part of your identity, so you resist letting it go. You temporarily forget why you wanted to change it so badly.
6. Backtracking - you choose to go back to or stick with the item they wished to change. You essentially talk yourself out of changing.

Inevitably you soon going to find yourself unhappy and discontent again.

You level of pain continue to increase until you reach another breaking point but it is going to be more extreme and more painful, than the previous one. This cycle will continue and continue until one of two things happen:

1.   Extreme Level of pain

You have a breaking point that is severe enough to push through the change cycle. For many people, unfortunately, it takes an extreme circumstance to push them to evolve, such as major financial loss, job loss, loss of a loved one, the ending of a relationship, a severe accident, or a nervous breakdown. If you resist changing long enough, something will happen in your life that will put you in a position where you have NO CHOICE but to change.

2.   Self-Honesty.

You have the humbling experience of realizing that there’s a part of you that doesn’t really want to change. You are comfortable with your habits, with what you know. You have a lot of fear that holds you back. You have many self-limiting beliefs. You receive some sort of benefit from staying where you are. You are unhappy because part of you want to be unhappy. You are addicted to the situation. You believe your pain is you; it’s your story. You can see your resistance to letting it go. Only after reaching this level of self-honesty can you truly choose to change.

Ask yourself below questions to check how honest you are ready to be and if you are finally ready to make a change:

• Can you see how this change cycle has impacted your life?
• Are you ready for it to stop?
• Have you experienced change amnesia before?
• What will happen if you continue NOT to change?
• Are you ready to swallow the pill of self-honesty, even if it is hard, because you are tired of being dissatisfied?
• Are you ready to take responsibility for your life and create the life you dream of having?
• Are you at the point where you will accept nothing less than what you truly want?

To conclude, I will say that it is always a choice - to change or stay where you are. Don’t waste your precious time “fighting” the change. It is not about changing or not. It is about having a peace of mind with whatever choice you make. Always.

Be honest with yourself. Make decision now, whatever it is. Commit. Start. Never look back. Enjoy. AND….if want all of this to happen fast and surely, ask for help!

I am here to help, just send me a message on [email protected] for more details.

#change #transformationcoach #success