You don't know what you're wrong about... but if know you're right, read on.

Which do you value more: the truth or your own beliefs?

Because they are not synonymous.

It’s pretty safe to assume that people reading this will have different opinions about many topics.

Fiscal policy. Parenting. Climate change. Racism. Religion. The leadership of your company or country or kid's school.

And you will very likely think that your opinion is the right one.

But here’s the deal:

You don’t know what you are wrong about.

Not only do you not know what you are wrong about, but your brain is wired to actively seek out information that confirms your current beliefs and to ignore, deny or dismiss that which doesn't. This doesn't make you a bad person. It makes you human.

Unless you are willing to lay your pride on the line and acknowledge that you do not have a monopoly on wisdom, you will find yourself being backed further and further into whatever corner of belief you've been investing your identity into. It's sunk cost bias in a social realm. I am certain that you've encountered many people going through life with answers to questions they have never asked; committed to 'truths' they have never questioned.

No doubt you’ve encountered numerous people in recent years committed to 'truths' they have never sought to verify; living with answers to questions they’ve never asked. In summing up the core findings from his vast research in human behavior, Nobel Laureate Daniel Kahneman said:

“Our excessive confidence in what we believe we know, and our apparent inability to acknowledge the full extent of our ignorance and the uncertainty of the world we live in.”

Our experience of our own rightness kills curiosity and blinds us to data that proves us wrong. This begs the question:

How do we - individually and collectively - in our teams, communities, organizations, and society - find better answers to the most pressing problems we're facing?

I have four suggestions.

1. Decide you value the truth over being right

This is easier said than done. It is also not psychologically comfortable. And chances are your ego will be arguing loudly for why you should hold firm to whatever you've been telling yourself is true. Perhaps for a long time. Perhaps your whole identity is invested in it. But simply deciding that you value what is true over what fuels your sense of righteousness is a very important first step.

2. Prioritize curiosity over certainty

When the iPhone first came out in 2007, Steve Ballmer, CEO of Microsoft at the time, dismissed it as a passing fad. "There's no chance that the iPhone is going to get any significant market share," he predicted confidently. "Not a chance."

Yup.

It's easy to laugh now but Ballmer did what plenty of other bright minds have done before him and what your own might be doing now - walking into the future blinded by your own certainties. So take a moment to ask yourself “How might I be wrong?”

Too often we let our own cognitive biases and blind spots derail the very conversations that might help us solve problems, adapt faster, seize opportunities and move forward smarter.

3. Listen to learn

Not to fix. Not to win. But to learn.

Left vs Right. The 'culture wars'. Minimum wages. Education reform. Roe v Wade. Pronouns.

Many people have strong opinions on the above. The next time you encounter someone who holds a belief that contradicts your own (particularly if it really triggers you!), try this:

Say, "I’m not sure I have the answer, but I’d like to understand what you think?"

And then, close your mouth, park your agenda, and truly listen.

Listen with curiosity.

Listen with humility.

Listen with both head and heart.

Most of all, listen with the willingness to be proven wrong.

This brings me to my final suggestion...

4. Be willing to change your mind

And then, if the new information you have learned expands the lens through which you've been viewing a problem or issue, have the courage to change your mind and more so, to share that with others.

"You made a good point I hadn’t thought of before. I see things differently now."

It takes a big person to concede idealistic ground they've previously fought hard to protect.

It takes an even bigger person to admit they had it wrong. People like Bill Marriott, Chairman of Marriott Hotels, who told me that listening with humility and staying open to being proven wrong is crucial for anyone seeking to lead others.

Leaders who are certain they are right are dangerous. Their sense of intellectual superiority stifles debate, stops them truly listening, blinds them to data proving them wrong and traps them in a world of their creation but which does not exist in reality.

None of us are immune to confirmation bias. All of us can fall into this mind trap. It’s why you must consciously and continually work to counter your own bias; to actively look for how you could be wrong. And while you likely think you are right about most things, it's almost certain that not everything you think is true and that some of what you think is, well... wrong. Or at least a little misguided.

You don't see the world as it is, but as you are.

You see the world through the lens of your life experiences and your pool of knowledge. And chances are, someone else possesses relevant knowledge that you don't. As I share in the video clip below from a keynote speech I gave to a room full of academic leaders (with a lot invested in their rightness), only when you are willing to unlearn what you think you know can you relearn what you need to know.

The word conversation comes from the Latin "to change, together."

When we engage in real conversation - willing to hear people out and to 'change our mind' - it not only lowers defenses and dismantles ideological walls, but it can leave all parties changed for the better.

Imagine the world we could create if we were each willing to put our 'rightness' aside and engage in civil conversations with genuine humility, curiosity and courage.

Now that's a world I'm committed to working toward. How about you?

Margie Warrell is the bestselling author of Stop Playing Safe: How To Be Braver In Work, Leadership and Life