Where to look for leadership & mentoring.

This weekend was full of emotions for me. It was a roller coaster of them. Highs and lows across the board. There were so many things happening in such a short period of time.

One thing that contributed to the wild ups and downs was the news that a former colleague, friend, and incredible mentor had passed away. Many of you know that Phil Self had been battling cancer for several years. There were times when things looked up for Phil, and times when they didn't. Throughout this process, Phil never seemed down. He continued with his positive attitude and kept assuring everyone he would keep marching forward. Which he did. At least until he couldn't. I'm so glad I was able to take him to breakfast in Colorado just a few weeks ago.

Phil and I worked together for a long time at IBM and then at Ricoh USA Graphic Communications . When Phil first came to the US on a short assignment, which fortunately for those who worked with him turned out to be much longer, he and I didn't work that much together. As the years went on and our roles changed, we collaborated more, leading to a fun, challenging, and inspiring working relationship. We frequently teased each other about whether the USA was better than the UK. This often resulted in many great laughs.

Phil was hands-down one of the best leaders I have ever worked with. More importantly, he was a phenomenal mentor to me. Over the years he was the perfect sounding board for advice, even if what he said was hard to hear. But, this is OK. I have always tried to keep a growth mindset and accept feedback -- especially when it moves you outside your comfort zone.

At the same time I was learning about Phil's passing, my daughter, Abigail Herold , was reaching new heights as the Battalion Commander for Colorado State University Army ROTC . Ever since Abby was about 3, we knew leadership was in her future. We have always said "it's Abby's world, and we are all just living in it." The highlights of her weekend are captured in the video below. What's missing from the video is when she presented Colonel Dorothy Clark with an American Flag as a thank-you for being the first female cadre member for CSU ROTC. Abby thanked her for what she had done for the program, and the Colonel said "Now it's your turn."

https://vimeo.com/1031172825

I'm sure that many of you have also experienced wonderful new people coming into your life as a result of where your children or other family members go in life, and from what they do. We certainly have as well. And we know how fortunate we are to have had so many wonderful people come into our lives. If you need some inspiration go spend some time with people younger than you. In particular, these ROTC cadets are amazing. They are committing years of their lives - all in the name of service.

So, this weekend was incredibly perplexing for me. On one hand, I realized a great mentor and leader I had worked with and relied on for many years was gone. Simultaneously, I was witnessing my daughter become that same mentor and leader for others.

These events reminded me that we don't always have to look for leadership and mentors in places where they are supposed to come from. And I say "reminded" because I have always tried to learn from (and therefore be mentored by) a variety of people. Even in my work as an Instructor in the Graduate School at the University of Colorado Denver Business School , I often feel I get more from my students than they do from me. They bring such a diverse range of thought and experiences, I just wish more people could be a part of it. And yes, I might be the first person to post about CSU and CU in the same article. :-)

Our mentors don't have to be older or more experienced. They need only provide us with context and perspective that we wouldn't have found without them. I assure you, they can be younger, less experienced, look differently than you do, be from another part of the world, speak a different language, or be different than you in all of these ways and many more.

This weekend was a reminder that none of our mentors are permanent. It was about the transitions of leaders and mentors. They may only be with us for a few moments. Or, it could be many great years. No matter how long it is, be sure to listen.