Where to Live After Getting Divorced
Today I am sharing?five simple tips about where you live after divorce. Moving after divorce can feel scary, as many unknowns do. But it can also be exciting. I am here to tell you, it doesn’t need to be perfect. As no residence is permanent and can change down the road. Knowing that your home after divorce can be a transitional home is really important, so be openminded.
Where to live after divorce is one of the biggest decisions to make. If you have children, you need to factor in schools, proximity to your co-parent, and proximity to family/friends that can support you. If you don’t have children, you may be feeling like you want a fresh start somewhere new. In both cases, you may want to primarily consider proximity to employment.
Following my divorce, the first place I lived was with my mother. This was temporary, luckily, because I have 3 kids and my mother has a 2 bedroom townhouse. So for a summer, the kids and I made the best of a squishy situation. I slept in a bed with 2 kids and 1 slept on the floor. This was not ideal…..but it was fine, and it was necessary.
After I was able to buy my own place, it was also not perfect but it was fine. Two of my kids shared a bedroom (they had their own bedrooms at their dads) and I was not in the same town that they went to school. So the living situation wasn’t perfect nor was the driving situation, but it was worked at the time. Again, residences need not be viewed as permanent and just need to be good for the time being.
Eventually I did move again and the kids have more space and I’m in the same town they go to school. They look back with fondness on their previous home and the memories we have there.
While it may feel really hard to leave your marital home in the past, make the best of the new home you are creating. Here are a few things to consider:
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1) Unless you feel like spreading your wings and taking off, make sure you stay close to your support system of family/friends.
2) If you have school aged kids, stay close to their other parent. It makes it harder on them if they need to travel far to go between houses. Work with your mediator/attorney to accomplish this goal.
3) Do not feel disheartened if your new place doesn’t live up to the standard of the previous one This is one of the tradeoffs of going from a marital home to a single person’s home and it’s very common.
4) If your agreement allows, take some favorite things from your “old” house to your new house. I brought some less than stellar furniture with me so that my kids felt the comfort of their old home in their new place.
5) Get excited to do some redecorating! You have a clean slate at your new place. You don’t need to spend much money to have fun…..hit up some thrift stores or look for some good sales. Hang up some cool pictures on the walls. Or even put on some painting clothes and paint your bedroom that color you’ve always wanted to.
Where to live after divorce is only something you can decide for you. Once you figure that out, make the best of the situation and enjoy this chapter in your life!
Good insight and also incorporating children in the decorating and making decisions so that even if it is temporary, the house becomes a home. With the transition of children between houses (depending on the agreement) and if your not in the original home, how a parent approaches the new house sets the tone if it becomes a home as well (if that makes sense). Thanks again.