Where are the kind leaders?

Where are the kind leaders?

What does a kind leader look like? And how can you spot them? That’s what I’m thinking about a lot at the moment.

It seems to me that the leaders we most often hear about (particularly in politics and in business) are the ones that follow what I think of as the ‘scary monster’ mould. They are very often loud, aggressive, tough, ‘strong’. In his book ‘Kind. The quiet power of kindness at work’ Graham Allcott describes this as the myth that being a bastard is how you succeed in business.

These types of leaders scorn anything that they perceive as weakness. And kindness is something that, if they allowed themselves to talk about it, they would deride as weak, fluffy and not a behaviour for a successful leader.

Like Graham, I wholeheartedly disagree with this view. Kindness is powerful because it connects us. It creates bonds, trust and collective action that gets results. It is an important attribute for successful leaders.

Why do kind leaders matter?

Here’s just a few of the studies that have found benefits of kind leadership:

  • A study by the Harvard Business Review showed that leaders who expressed kindness found difficult conversations and providing uncomfortable feedback easier (due to the relationships they’d built up)
  • A study for the University of Warwick found kindness increased happiness and happier people ended up 12% more productive than less happy people
  • A study in Canada found that kind behaviours being encouraged at work led to a 20% performance improvement compared to organisations where this wasn’t happening

(Thank you to Graham and his book for these stats – I’d highly recommend you read the book in full to find out more.)

Kind leaders are many things but crucially, in this context, kind leaders get the job done.

What do kind leaders look like?

Kindness in leaders shows up in all sorts of ways. Fundamentally it’s about putting people first. It’s about genuinely valuing them, listening to them and connecting with them. This creates an environment of trust and mutual connection that allows you to work collectively, even during difficult times.

It also means having difficult conversations and holding people accountable (having first established clarity about the end goal and your team’s role in that). Being kind is not the same as just being nice.

Over the last few years, we have shared the stories of several kind leaders through the Time for Kindness programme and these are always well received. If you need some of that positivity, have a read:

How can we change things?

I started up the Time for Kindness programme because I believe there is lots of kindness in the world, we just don’t talk about it enough – yet!

What that means in the space of leadership, is that there aren’t enough stories shared about people who lead with kindness. Those leaders are out there, but they’re not visible enough. Two of the issues that this causes:

  • A lack of hope related to the impact of the unkind leaders we have. Their approach seems negative, self-serving and destructive for a positive way forward for us as a collective. The fear that if you’re not ‘in their gang’, you will be left behind.
  • A lack of visible positive role models for anyone who wants to lead differently. It seems that the only way to be a successful leader is to follow this negative blueprint. Many people coming into leadership roles don’t feel comfortable with that, it doesn’t sit true with who they are. But the message they get for how you’re ‘supposed’ to lead is often this negative one.

But there ARE leaders out there who are leading with kindness, in all sorts of ways. And we need to tell their stories more often and more loudly.

We need to shout about them from the roof-tops.

We need to show these role models are there.

We need to inspire future leaders and give ourselves hope.

An action for you to take

In the coming weeks and months, I’m going to run a campaign through my Time for Kindness programme to amplify the stories of kind leaders.

If you know one, comment on this article, tell us what makes them so kind, tag them if they’re here on LinkedIn. Ask your network to tell us about the leaders they know too.

Together we can shift the conversation about leadership.


I am an independent kindness cheerleader and communicator. I work with my clients to find ways to communicate their kindness stories, change attitudes and behaviours, and achieve their organisational goals. Find out more about my comms work on my comms website and about the Time for Kindness workshops on the dedicated programme site.

Stacy Sarno

Office Manager at Digital Brand Expressions

4 周

My coworker Natalie Lorenzo and I would like to nominate our boss, Veronica Fielding to be considered for you Kind Leaders campaign.??Veronica “Niki” Fielding genuinely cares about her employees.?She wants us to be happy with the work we put into the world but also maintain a healthy balance with our personal lives. ?She is an incredibly considerate and intelligent leader who collaborates with us to find solutions rather than imposing them. Niki constantly finds new ways to celebrate the team.?One of her recent initiatives is sharing our "wins", where each of us shares our achievements from the past week, no matter how big or small. Niki always congratulates each employee and thanks them for their hard work. She also makes a point to get to know each of us personally, asking how we are and engaging in weekly team-building activities. She coined the term “Zoomraderie” (a blend of Zoom and camaraderie), where our team uses platforms like Zoom or Kumospace to play games and get to know each other better. Niki, not only works to create a kind workplace for her team, but she founded an online resource (@A Better Paradigm) which helps businesses find training programs, events, and tools to foster more compassionate workplaces.

Helen Rimmer ACC

I make work better. Burnout, Kindness and Wellbeing coach, keynote speaker and trainer. I transform Leaders / aspiring leaders to create sustainable organisations through kindness and wellbeing. The Kind Librarian.

1 个月

I have been thinking about this a bit more and do want to do a shoutout to my old manager Matthew Brooke he was always kind, the culture that we had at RHUL when I worked with him was amazing and down in no small part to him reflecting often on it. One time I had a car accident on the way home, I called him just to say I had had this accident and he drove to where I was, waited with me for recovery and a taxi and helped me unload the car. So a small tale of leadership kindness there.

Kim Stokes

"How do they do it all?!" – | Flip the 'have it all' script | Define and live YOUR all | Coach, Snr HR & Mum (Spoiler: they don’t!)

1 个月

What a great article Sarah Browning (she/her) - looking forward to hearing more examples and celebrations of kind leaders - for me, the leaders I remember that have had the most positive impact are through how they've made me feel - in the good times & the challenging. Reminds me of one of my favourite and well know Maya Angelou quotes "People Will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel"

Lucy Whitehall (she/her)

Coaching leaders to thrive through transition

1 个月

Just seen this Sarah Browning (she/her) I coach so many leaders who are kind. They often worry that kindness = weakness ?? Not true! Kindness is a stealth strength for leaders ??

Jonathan Chrimes

RN & kindness advocate

1 个月

Kind leadership: “It’s about doing what’s right, even when it’s uncomfortable.” Clare Thompson

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