Where does empathy live in your leadership?

Empathy what is it and why is it important?

We hear much about the qualities of an empathetic leader- so firstly what is empathy and secondly what qualities and attributes does an empathetic?leader bring to an organisation?

The word empathy originates from the ancient Greek word empatheia - meaning physical affection or passion – The modern interpretation of the word stems from the German word “Einfühlung” meaning “feeling into” – It was introduced into the English language by psychologist Edward Titchener (1867 – 1927) as a term to explain the abilities of humans to understand and feel another’s distress and challenges.

So, what's the difference between sympathy and empathy - with sympathy you logically get it you understand their issue/concern it however does not have a lasting impact and you can move on forward whilst being sympathetic with no real emotional tax or toll.

With empathy you are situating yourself in the other parties issue/concern you are in touch with what it would feel like - your able to frame the situation as if it was a live issue for yourself - by situating yourself and your feelings into the heart of the matter means you are able to understand the level of stress, pain or grieve that the other party is experiencing.

This allows for a reframing of your perspective and can change your view on how you then manage the situation.

Empathy does not come naturally to all of us - the good news is that we can however train ourselves to be more empathetic humans and therefore better leaders. What might this look like?

• We don't jump in diagnose and tell the other party what to do - we don't provide a solution.
• We don’t judge – the issue, events or individuals’ feelings.
• We provide a space to listen.
• We situate ourselves within their challenge/issue
• We imagine how we would feel in this situation

In many instances as leaders, we think the requirement and need is for us to rapidly find and provide a quick answer - no doubt there are elements of our role that require this but they tend to be mechanical, systematic or operational.

When it comes to our people, our human capital it pays to listen to understand - we don't always have to agree with what we hear but we always must be cognoscente of the fact that for our team member the situations are both very real and important.

An empathetic leader shares that although one always appears to have a level of confidence and competence there are moments and times of both fear and insecurity – these are not to be dismissed.

They are to be managed through acknowledgment/investigation and sitting with, then working through the feelings they illicit.

The empathetic leader shares to highlight not only an understanding but also to demonstrate things are not always as the seam.

The empathetic leader promotes a safe and secure - (this does not mean overly forgiving or soft) environment. It is an environment where this leader genuinely cares - you can't buy this or fabricate it, you have to do the work, you have to invest.

The investment overtime is getting to know your team as a person first and employee second. It's taking time to find out about their families, what are their outside interests, what are their dreams, goals, and aspirations.

Time and time again it’s proven that these efforts promote a wellness and security for team members that naturally have a positive effective on an employee's overall performance and the good will factor they hold for their leader/employer.?

Team members do not leave bad organisations they leave bad bosses - it pays to remember people care less about what you say or did and a whole lot more about how you made them feel.

In closing and to wrap up your week – Think about when you have most recently been the recipient of empathy from another and importantly ask yourself when in the recent past have you provided support and empathetic leadership to your team, family or broader community.

Please feel free to share your own thoughts/comments on empathetic leadership and any examples you might have, or more generally shout out/DM me if, like me, you have an interest in all things people, performance and culture.