Where Did All The Discipline Go?
Michael Hewitt
Public Speaking Coach | Professional Opera Singer | Former Full-Cycle Cyber Security Enterprise AE | Helping sales teams speak with true confidence ??? break out of monotone with The 7 Skills of Tonality
What you need to know
Discipline is how things get done.
Discipline is both fixed and unfixed. You have an infinite amount of potential discipline to realize. Your current levels of discipline don’t dictate how disciplined you?can?be.?
At the same time, you either?are or you?aren’t.?
You need discipline to get something done. But you also need discipline in order to keep the results you worked hard for, and even more discipline to improve upon them.?
There's the discipline to get there, the discipline to keep going, and the discipline to maintain standards.?
They are varied, but also the same.?
Discipline's not sexy or shiny…but it delivers the things that are.?
You want to own a shiny new car without discipline? Good luck.?
You want a powerful body without discipline? Good luck maintaining results.?
You want relationships that matter and are real? You need a kind of discipline for that, too.?
Discipline is the key to living a fulfilled life. So where did all the discipline go??
Where most go wrong
People seek motivation over discipline. Do they conflate the two? Possibly. ?
Or, motivation is just cheaper and lower hanging fruit. A “false lift” - another shiny object we chase instead of buckling down and doing the work.?
And so, people rely on motivation levels (thinking of it like a tank of gas) to determine their action output.?
“I wanna get started but I’m not feeling motivated.”
“Dude I’ve lost my motivation, I don’t really feel like it.”
Flush “feeling like it”. You either want something, or you don’t.?
That sort of thinking reveals that for you, “motivation” is distraction. “Motivation” is procrastination.
The thing you’re trying to get motivated to do? You’re not looking for what to do – you already know what to do! Because you’ve admitted there’s?something?you’re seeking motivation?for!?
JUST DO THE THING! Enthusiasm for it comes with momentum.?
Take the literal example of a training session.?
You don’t want to train. You’re sore. You’re tired. Your S/O is inviting you to snuggle. So you type in “fitness motivation” into Youtube. Now you’re listening to Eric Thomas yell at you, while missing his point.?
He’s saying “GET UP AND GET AFTER IT! YOU’RE ONLY LISTENING TO ME BECAUSE YOU DON’T WANT IT BADLY ENOUGH!”
But you’re hearing “yea, yea, yea, when I want to succeed as bad as I want to breath, then I’ll be successful!”?
And your actions say that you want a temporary dopamine hit of?feeling?like you pushed yourself and did the work….without doing a drop of it.?
Figuratively missing the forest for the trees.?
Motivation porn is a trap. It conditions people into thinking the timeline between?effort?and not just result, but?desired result?is shorter than it is.?
Much shorter.?
So after putting in 1/100th?of the requist effort needed, people look at their results and go “nope. Not working for me. Onto the next.”
So they bounce to a?different?hobby, teacher, program, coach, diet, fad, guru expecting a?different?result…with no change to effort.?
The definition of insanity is something like “doing the same thing and expecting a different result.”
People deluded into thinking they need “motivation” to get started are insane.?
I think about this like science class, observing gunk under a microscope. All lenses have their uses. But if you need to be seeing a broader picture, and you’re using the most zoomed in lens, you won’t see what you need to see.?
A literal example of people missing the forest for the trees. Take away the science class, and it looks like this (for example):?
Ugh. Scale has gone up 1.2 pounds this week. This diet and program are a scam.
Scale hasn’t moved south in a few days….but it’s been trending consistently downwards for months. However, if you’re only looking at day-to-day trends, you can’t see that.
When expectation and reality are not in alignment, the stage is set for frustration, self-sabotage, and impatience.?
What happens without
Without discipline, you stay the same. Exactly as you are now, give it or take some marginal changes.?
Five weeks or five years from now, you’ll be having the same problems.
You might make a little progress, soon replaced by regression.?
You’re treading water in the race of your life.?
Ready to get serious??
How it’s done
We agreed that discipline isn’t fixed in quantity or quality. It’s not unlike a cartoon avalanche: starts out a little moving snowball, ends up swallowing everything in it’s path.?
So, step 1: start small.?
Pick something menial. Something you actively look to cut corners on. Making your bed, cleaning your countertops, doing the dishes, flossing, bed and wake times.
Whatever you pick, let this be the?only?activity you try this with (at first).?
You’re going to do it?to the death.?
Meaning, if your life depended on success or failure in that one single activity, act?as if.?
You’re going to do the dishes with a different level of focus, thoroughness, and execution if Luca Brasi is at the ready behind you.?
Now, do it every day. Every time it needs to be done. Each time,?to the death. When you’ve mechanically mastered it, then it’s time to fall in love with it it.?
Find ways to make it new every time.?
Not getting bored with something isn’t external, it’s internal. If you get bored with something, it’s because you didn’t scrub the activity for a relevant lesson to learn.?
Once you’ve transcended boredom (through gamification or any other method), connect the dots.?
Start seeing how the act, and the thoughts that keep you stimulated and present, has applications to seemingly unrelated fields.?
Don’t believe that how you do one thing is how you do everything??
Try this for 3 days. Not even a whole week.?
Don’t seek motivation.?
Just do it until you do it, then do it again better. That’s discipline.?
In iron and gratitude,
Michael
Founder @ Intake Amy | Smarter, Smoother Intake | Focus on Clients, Not Chaos
3 年This is excellent. I especially love the discipline v. motivation frame. Spot on!
Professor of Voice at Rice University
4 年Well done! Excellent article!! RR