When you hit a roadblock...

There are often times when it seems that the world is falling apart in front of our own eyes. When you have some plans and they do not work out as you would have wished. For instance, you wanted to be in a football or cricket team at your school. You trained vigorously over months for that one shot to be the star player you always wanted to be by just being in the team to impress your first ever crush in school since grade 5. You give your best, I would say 110 or 120%. But there always someone better than you who makes it in the team. You feel lost, betrayed, you start thinking what went wrong. You give in to the cruel, downward spiral of self-doubt, you say harsh words to yourself, you are unforgiving to what has happened. Have you been through such experience?

On a personal level, the example that I just mentioned is mine. I am sure that you might have also experienced, not exactly the same, but a similar experience. The experiences can range from either side of extremes. Whether it may be getting into a good university for your bachelor's or master's (in your own or a foreign country), or getting into that dream company, or a start-up you wanted to form you be the captain of your own ship to as simple as sitting in a quaint place to evaluate your day. And mind you the latter is complicated. Again, the fact of the game of life.

After reading a modest amount of books, articles, interviews and any other media of content consumption of the great men and women of our era, such as Gargi Vachaknavi, from the ancient times who surpassed men in the knowledge of the Vedas to Immanuel Kant, who reasoned that we can only have knowledge of things that are possible to experience. There are various examples other than these men and women who have us understand the greater meaning and helped shape our thinking in one or the other way. One striking feature is that these honourable specimens of our world history had to face roadblocks and uncomfortable situations when they put forth their theories and understanding of their world around them. The point being, roadblocks are the gatekeepers to the great hall of new experiences, eventually inching to the throne of success.

Now the questions, what to do when you hit one. Let us take some tried and tested strategies into account that I follow:

1. Stand down for a while: This is one of the vital steps on the road to recovery. Take a day or two off. Think of what could be improved the next time and not on beating yourself up by dipping towards the south. Sip a cup of tea, coffee, beer, anything you like, return to your designated place of eternal sanctity (can be mental or physical), talk to the people you love, respect. These can be your family, mentors, coaches, Gurus, or just nature. Your call.
2. Re-evaluate your priorities: Scrutinize what could be temporarily eliminated, pushed forward, limited. Shift your focus. Wove tasks and activities around these priorities. These could be daily, monthly, quarterly, etc. Read, research, write and tell your goals in forms of stories to yourself. I leave this to your better sense of judgement.
3. Be agile: With the changing situations, be ready to accept change and take it into your stride. As cliché as it may sound, but 'Change is the only constant' or as Charles Darwin puts it 'In the long history of humankind (and animal kind, too) those who learned to collaborate and improvise most effectively have prevailed.'
4. Do not, I repeat, do not feel guilty: You are not alone. Everyone is fighting his own battles. It takes a matter of time and efforts to understand that some battles have to be lost to win the great wars. Again, another facet of the game of life.
5. Plan B: Apart from your work, family and friends, for humans to survive, I am a proponent of the fact that one needs to have an identity apart from what he does to earn his livelihood. Having a character and characteristics that go beyond the mere tasks and responsibilities, gives our lives meaning and purpose. If you have found yours, you are in the lucky club of the few who could transcend to a higher level of freedom from materialism. If not, you will get there. Some more efforts my friend.

There you go. You are now equipped with my arsenal of arms to fight uncertainties and roadblocks. I cannot guarantee the sequential form of the strategies, but I am certain that this would be of help.

I leave you with: Instead of thinking 'I have to do it', trick your mind into thinking 'I get to do it.' You will definitely encounter the change you want. There exists no reason to give up on your dreams! Strive!