When You Get Great Feedback, Dig Even Deeper

A client calls with great news: she loved the work I did on my just-completed assignment. It’s so tempting to just thank her and enjoy the moment.

I resist that impulse and ask her, “Is there anything I could have done to make your life easier or delivered even more value to you?”

At first, she protests and says she can’t think of anything. But I force myself to be quiet and eventually she mentions two small items that will be easy to address on my next assignment.

It’s human nature to take positive feedback and move on. It’s a relief to know that your work was well-accepted and your client, boss or colleague is happy. But every person willing to provide you with honest feedback represents a learning opportunity. None of us are capable of judging our own performance with complete objectivity.

On the other hand, asking for suggestions regarding how you could have done even better exposes you to the possibility that you may be asked to do something you don’t wish to do. Fortunately, there is a way around that: word your request carefully.

To cite a simple example, if you were asking your spouse for feedback, don’t say, “Is there anything I can do differently?” or you may spend the rest of your life taking out the garbage. Instead, you might ask, “How do you think we could improve our weekly restaurant date night?” This gives the other person permission to make suggestions within a narrow range.

Gathering valuable feedback is both an art and a science. Don’t just settle for the words you wish to hear.

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I help successful leaders and their teams agree on what needs to change and how to make it happen. I am the author of?Fearless?Growth and?The Agility Advantage.?

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