When Words Collide

"I don't think you are listening to what I am saying!" a colleague snaps at another in a project call.

After 15 minutes of gridlock & back-and-forth remarks between the two, the conversation ends in a passive-aggressive, "Okay, let's take this offline".

A collective waste of time for everyone in the meeting & no progress to show for it.

Sounds familiar?

Communication in today's corporate world often feels inspired by the phrase- "unstoppable force meets an immovable object."

Orders are fired off on emails ignoring any common courtesies, with little acknowledgment that there's a real person on the other side. Subtle power-plays with words that are carefully chosen to gain the upper hand. Raw feedback is shared with someone publicly in group calls, instead of privately in one-on-ones.

So naturally, friction is imminent. And the result? Stalled progress & frustration for all.

Can we do better?

At it's core, communication is the movement of information from one person to another. And like everything that moves, the flow of information faces resistance from two forces:

Friction & Viscosity

• Friction is inevitable when two people interact. It arises from their personal differences & unique perspectives. It also depends on their willingness to listen to each other, and their alignment - or lack thereof - on shared goals.
• Viscosity is shaped by the environment we communicate in. For example, emails and texts are more “viscous” than in-person meetings, slowing the flow of information. Corporate culture, transparency, and trust also dictate how smoothly communication moves.

When faced with communication issues, most people react by applying more force to assert their point. But wouldn't it be easier & less stressful to reduce the resistance instead?

Reducing friction is a matter of practicing mutual respect, showing appreciation for others’ contributions, and most importantly, aligning on common goals.

Reducing viscosity, on the other hand, could be more difficult as it may need changes in the corporate culture. But at a personal level, the least one can do is to communicate with each other with trust & transparency, and to keep your feedback channels open.

Communication at workplace doesn’t have to feel like an uphill battle always. When we focus on reducing resistance, we can create space for understanding, respect and shared success.