"When 'What Do You Think?' Turns Into 'What Were You Thinking?!'"

Philippa Mathewson , a respectful thought leader asked " I'm curious to know if you have ever had a moment where this trusty question didn’t work as planned?"

They say life is a two-way street. But no one warns you about the roundabout of doom that occurs when you casually toss out a "What do you think?" only for the conversation to spiral into chaos, confusion, or outright disaster. I learned this the hard way. Let me paint you a picture.

The Setup

It was a regular Monday morning—or as I call it, the Day of Unsolicited Opinions. I was in a meeting, sipping my third cup of coffee (fueling both productivity and poor decisions), when my team presented an idea. It was… fine. Not groundbreaking, not terrible. Just fine.

Wanting to appear like the wise, collaborative leader I pretend to be on LinkedIn, I leaned back in my chair, steepled my fingers like a budget Bond villain, and said, "Hmm. What do you think?"

A harmless question, right? Wrong.

The Domino Effect

At first, it seemed to work. The team perked up, throwing out ideas like confetti. Great. Engagement. Collaboration. Synergy. Buzzwords everywhere. But then it happened—Moh spoke up.

Now, Moh is the guy who wears socks with motivational quotes and considers himself a deep thinker. He looked me dead in the eye and said, "Actually, what do you think?"

The First Turn of the Tables

Caught off guard, I chuckled nervously. "Well, I’m here to hear your ideas," I said, trying to pass the conversational hot potato back.

But Moh being Moh wasn’t having it. "No, no," he insisted. "We’d really value your perspective."

Cue the panic. What was my perspective? I had spent so much energy looking thoughtful and enigmatic that I forgot to form an opinion. I scrambled for something profound, but all I could think about was whether it was too early for lunch or do we need a cookies replenishment.

The Spiral

Sensing my hesitation, Ken from accounting jumped in. "If you don’t have a clear stance, maybe we’re not aligned on the goals?" she said, her tone dripping with passive-aggressive cheerfulness.

And just like that, the wolves smelled blood.

"What’s our timeline for this?" someone else piped up. "How does this align with the bigger strategy?" asked another. "Can we revisit the budget?" chimed in Karen again, clearly enjoying her moment.

Suddenly, I was no longer the sage leader orchestrating ideas. I was a deer in the headlights of a PowerPoint presentation gone rogue.

The Final Blow

Desperate to regain control, I tried a classic deflection: "Well, let’s circle back to this after some more thought."

But Moh—curse his motivational socks—delivered the final blow. "Actually, why don’t we resolve it now? I think it’s important to show decisiveness."

Touché, Moh. Touché.

The Lesson

That day, I learned a valuable lesson: Never ask "What do you think?" unless you’re prepared for the tables to turn faster than a lazy Sush at a buffet. It’s like poking a bear—you think you’re in control, but you’re really just seconds away from being mauled by follow-up questions.

Now, I’ve adapted. I still ask for opinions, but I always come armed with my own take—something vague yet confident, like "I’m leaning toward Option B, but I’m curious about your thoughts." Translation: "I have no idea, but let’s make this your problem."

So, the next time you’re tempted to throw out a "What do you think?" just remember: It’s all fun and games until the tables turn, and suddenly you are the one doing the thinking. And trust me, no amount of coffee can prepare you for that. Thank you Philippa Mathewson for bringing the elephant in the room upfront.