When we struggle with saying no

Do you ever find yourself in situations where you feel you are supposed to act a certain way, yet the question 'What's the worst that could happen?' pops up in your head? In those moments, you stand on the brink of honoring your own values and needs, but a whirlwind of 'what ifs' muddles your decision. Today, we're diving into those moments where we reluctantly said yes, even when everything inside us meant to say no. Let's explore our agenda:

?? Can the stop sign be green?

?? The attitude of a mountain

?? Different views of boundaries

?? Content recommendations and what's new

?? Can the stop sign be green?

Recently, as the writer of this edition, I stumbled upon the post below, and at first, I just laughed and sent it to a friend. But then, I paused in my scrolling and realized how often I actually do the same thing. I hang on just to see how the story unfolds, wondering if there will be an unexpected twist or if people will surprise me in some way.

It's completely okay to explore new paths in life, and there's no way to truly predict the outcome of our decisions. But how often have we allowed others to overstep our boundaries, hoping things would turn out differently this time?

Here's the thing: it's not the responsibility of others to surprise or fulfill us. It's on us. If we're not clear and consistent in setting our boundaries, it's easier to end up frustrated with others rather than recognizing our role in the situation. Relationships and boundaries are formed together.

Pointing fingers at others may make us feel better momentarily. It's a self-defense mechanism. But more often than not, it keeps us replaying the same scenarios in our relationships with little personal growth or change. It is not about removing or taking on the responsibility from others but about taking an active stance on how you want your life to be shaped.

Only when we truly own our boundaries and consistently maintain them can we shift the dynamics and direction of our relationships.

When was the last time you gave a green light when in fact it was redder than lava? How do you think you could express yourself differently to be clearer? Find support in our content recommendation for the week.

?? The attitude of a mountain

Last weekend, our teammate Nisan visited the Odunpazari Modern Museum (OMM) in Turkey and was deeply moved by an explanation of a painting by Etel Adnan, a poet and painter born in Beirut. Nisan shared with us Adnan's compelling interpretation of her own paintings. It goes like this: If you are lucky, you find a mountain. The mountain is the acceptance of things as they are, like the moon, the sun – cosmic events on which we have no bearing. Painting the mountain incessantly was 'sanity resolved by visual means.

Mountains mirror a certain mindset in their clarity, stability, and grandeur. There are times when we all need to stand firm like a mountain, confronting challenges head-on. Likewise, there are moments when we need to establish our boundaries distinctly, much like the defined edges of a mountain, as mentioned in the previous chapter.

But let's make one thing clear. We're not endorsing the harmful belief that you should always remain immovable and strong. You are human, with deep and complex emotions, not an unfeeling mountain.

Conversely, a certain type of wellness culture subtly implies we should only feel, accept, and let go. Resilience—the ability to recover from tough times—is one of our most powerful assets. Sometimes, resilience means giving ourselves the space to heal. Other times, it's about showing our inner strength through our choices, actions, and words.

So, if our goal is to protect our emotional well-being without causing harm to others, then the ways we guard ourselves must be flexible and adapted to each situation. At times, we need to be as firm and grounded as a mountain to make clear where our boundaries lie. Yet, in different circumstances, we might choose to be as pliable and accommodating as a stalk of wheat.

So, what does it mean for you to be resilient lately? When did you last see yourself as rooted as a mountain or as flexible as wheat?

?? Different views of boundaries

Sex and the City really brings the topic of personal boundaries to life. Throughout the series, we see Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda in all sorts of situations – from career challenges to complicated relationships. They each have their own way of saying what they will and won't put up with.

In each episode, you see them figuring out life, making choices, and sometimes messing up. It's not just about the fun and drama; it's how they handle tough situations and tell people what's okay and what's not.

Now, maybe you don't have your own HBO award-winning show, but you surely have a group of friends where everyone has a different point of view regarding daily topics like politics, relationships, and life.

For you, for example, infidelity could be an ending point in your relationship. But for a friend, it could mean a new beginning.

If you have been struggling with your boundaries lately, take a closer look at your relationships with your closest ones. How do you work your boundaries around them? Do you feel their opinions guide your path, or do they operate as signs for you to decide on the road? Are you confident enough to say I think the opposite?

Supporting your boundaries around people you feel confident enough with is a good exercise to do so with others you find more challenging, like your parents, managers, or teachers. Don't be afraid to speak your mind and show what you truly believe in.

?? Content recommendations and what’s new

Meditation

A new meditation series!

If you're open to building new habits, Building Positive Habits series is for you. In these meditations, you'll find the inspiration, motivation, and awareness to adopt positive habits, such as regular movement and consuming nutritious food. Here's the first meditation of the series:

A new collection!

We put together the daily meditations that collected the most number of stars. Give it a try! You may find one to support you during the week.

Thanks for being with us today and reflecting on our boundaries, which we all sometimes fail to claim. Fortunately, there is always time to prioritize ourselves.

Feel free to share this edition with someone you care about.

Until next week!