When there is toxicity in your relationship…

When we are looking to create change, uplevel, and make a move in our relationship and our life, we might find that we don’t know where to start. Or that we have tried all the things we know and ran out of ideas and so are feeling hopeless. Or that we feel so stuck we want to give up. Or that we know what we have to do but are too scared to take a first step or an action towards making a change. All this is part of the human experience when we are trying to better our situation, create what we desire and continue to evolve to the best version of ourselves…

But not to fret, even though this is part of the human experience, it doesn’t mean that we have to endure additional suffering. It doesn’t have to be hard at the end of the day.?

If we were to actually fully own ourselves and not our partner or others, if we stayed in our circle . If we focused on honoring ourselves , our own evolution and growth, and how we show up to our relationship and our life instead of using excuses, victimizing ourselves and blaming others. We’d truly be empowered and able to create what we desire in all areas of our life…?

What if we were to focus on keeping our side of the street clean… On showing up with our best self- resourced , self-regulated and soothed , boundaried , compassionate , attuned and kind and generous . Can you image how fast your interactions would shift? How fast your relationship would uplevel? I can, I see it day in and day out not only in my own relationship but in countless others with the couple therapy work we do .?

What is some of the work to do??

~ Declutter your relationship and life perspective- clean up distorted thinking

~ Clear, deconstruct and deprogram patterns- heal and release old wounds and stuck emotions

~ Detox from defensive and reactive mechanisms- upgrade coping mechanisms and self-regulation

~ Reset stories, scripts and narratives- replace the victim with a victor mindset?

~ Clean up your approach to your partner and your circumstances- try different tactics, skills and tools?

When you let go of the old, the hurts, wounds, patterns, practices, habits, characteristics, and such, you create space to become more who you are- your better version of you, creating a refresh for the new to immerge in all areas of your life…

Here is to a replenishing and shifting refresh and to all the newness!?

In today’s podcast episode, I have a lovely and fun conversation with Cinthia Hiett, also a relationship expert, where we discuss toxic interactions in relationship, dealing with an immature spouse or an immature partner, what codependency looks like in relationship and in the world, how to set boundaries, growing ourselves up and dealing with our inner child, and so much more.?

Tune in, you are in for a treat!

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