When a student offers you a gift... what should you make of it?
Sara de Almeida Leite
Full professor at ISEC Lisboa, PhD in Portuguese Language Teaching
It is test day and your higher education students are all nervously waiting for you to give them the final "blow". Yours is one of the subjects that they have the hardest time studying for, and that many fear they won't be able to pass. Much as they try to memorize and retain the information you convey, it still seems to be too complex to grasp, for the majority of them.
Some are already sitting at their desks, with their pens ready, when you enter the classroom. As you approach the teacher's desk, you realize that a bar of chocolate has been placed there: it's obviously a gift for you. Your Russian student, the keenest in the class, smiles shyly and says: ?It's Russian?, confirming, with a nod, that it is meant to sweeten your palate.
Could you have been inadvertently dragged into an ethical dilemma? Would it be fair to assume that she expects to have a positive mark in return? Is it not hasty, perhaps even absurd, to (mis)take this gentle offer for a bribe?
You are nevertheless in doubt: to judge the gesture too quickly might well be unjust and cynical. But to simply be delighted and move on could be thoroughly naive. And you're bound to remember this when you read her answers to the questions in the test, later this week, or at least when you realize that her result is a mere 8 or 9 out of 20. Even if you have dismissed it until then, the question will resurface: did that chocolate have a purpose?
You prefer to think that your Russian student would be offended by such a thought. You thank her earnestly, and add that you happen to like chocolate very much.
And while everyone is quietly and carefully doing the exercises, you reflect a bit more upon the issue. Then you remember that detail about this particular student: the fact that she is so keen, so interested in learning, so hardworking. She never missed a class, she clearly made every possible effort to understand and take in what she was supposed to know.
Never mind the chocolate. You already admired her for her perseverance, all the more so because she is older than you, she has 2 degrees already, and she is starting all over again, from scratch, because she is an immigrant. Life has been as hard on her as it has been easy on you.
Now, you also admire her for her generosity. And you are sure that, if she fails, she will accept failure as part of the process of living the life that she has chosen. You know that she won't blame you and she certainly won't think that she has wasted a bar of chocolate on the wrong teacher.
So, basically, when a student offers you a gift, don't just appreciate the gift itself. Look at the big picture, contextualize it. Then, if you must, analyse it and draw a conclusion.