When Speaking Up Fails: How to Resolve Miscommunication In The Workplace

To resolve miscommunication in the workplace, start by de-escalating tensions through maintaining composure, offering apologies, and allowing time for emotions to settle. Next, actively work on restoring relationships by clarifying your intentions, seeking feedback, and engaging in positive interactions. Lastly, pivot your communication strategy to ensure your message gets across.

Can you get in trouble for speaking your mind at work? We’ve all been there: You speak your mind, and suddenly, things don’t go as planned. Whether it’s a misunderstanding or a full-blown conflict, the way you handle the aftermath can significantly influence your professional relationships and personal growth. Discover nine intelligent strategies to navigate these tricky waters and turn a potential setback into a step forward.

When I Almost Got Fired for Speaking My Mind

Can you be punished for speaking up at work? I almost did. Ever felt like just another cog in the machine? That was me, feeling undervalued and utterly bored at work. My days were a repeat loop of unchallenging tasks that barely scratched the surface of my capabilities. Having a background in consulting, I craved more strategic work, something to sink my teeth into and make a real impact. So, I decided to discuss this with my manager.

To my surprise, my manager had big plans. He shared his vision of transforming our department into a center of excellence, essentially an internal consulting hub for the company. This was my chance! Utilizing his connections, he arranged a meeting with a senior leader to understand his challenges and explore how we could support the implementation of his strategy.

As I dove into the research for the project, the thrill of meaningful work was exhilarating. However, not long after I started, I encountered a barrier. During a casual lunch in the cafeteria, I approached a colleague from finance.

As we chatted, he bluntly stated that he was leading the project and advised me to step aside. His dominant demeanor caught me off-guard, and rather than contest his claim, I chose to back down. Over the next two years, he would secure a double promotion.

I redirected my efforts towards networking within other departments. I met with various leaders I knew, learning about their projects and offering my assistance. However, this proactive approach almost cost me my job.

My manager pulled me aside one day, his expression grave. The SVP was on the verge of firing me if I didn't cease my networking efforts immediately. He advised me to keep a low profile, which meant tethering myself to my desk and limiting my interactions.

The Speaking Up Misstep Recovery

Yet, I couldn't completely suppress my desire to contribute and grow. I continued to network, albeit more discreetly. Whenever I spotted senior leaders dining alone in the cafeteria, I'd join them, focusing more on personal rapport rather than professional gain. During one of these lunches, I reconnected with another SVP I had previously worked with, careful this time not to overstep.

In the meantime, I didn't let the quiet hours at my desk go to waste. I developed a PowerPoint presentation packed with innovative ideas and asked for 30 minutes with the SVP who had nearly fired me. To my relief and delight, he was impressed. So much so, that in a few months he created a new position and promotion for me.

It turns out this position was transferred from another SVP — the one I had those lunches with. He’d set it up so I could build and lead my own team to support his. This new role not only allowed me to build and lead a new team but also positioned me to strategically support ongoing projects in other teams.

Despite almost being fired for speaking up for what I wanted and believed in, I helped gained a promotion and the exact work I was looking for. The misstep still helped my SVP understand what I wanted. It would have been more productive to have spoken to him directly at the start, but I made the mistake, and still won at the end because I took some strategic steps to recover.

Here are 3 pro tips to recover when speaking up causes conflict:

1. De-Escalate: Soften The Blow

Maintain Composure: Staying Calm and Professional

It’s easy to react impulsively when things heat up, but maintaining your composure is crucial. Resist the urge to complain, become defensive, or react explosively. No matter the situation, keeping cool and collected will serve you better in the long run.

Think of yourself as a captain navigating through stormy seas. The crew (your colleagues) will feel safer and more confident if you remain calm and in control.

Apologize Effectively: Addressing Harm and Inconvenience

If your words or actions have caused harm, an effective apology can go a long way in de-escalating tensions. Offering a sincere apology is like applying a soothing balm to a burn. It may not reverse the damage, but it can significantly reduce the sting and aid healing. It shows your accountability and willingness to mend fences, which can be crucial in maintaining professional relationships.

Pause Strategically: Allowing Time for Tensions to Ease

Sometimes, all you need is a bit of time. Allowing emotions to settle and letting the positives of your relationship come to the forefront can help ease other people’s tension and strengthen bonds.

2. Recover: Actively Restore The Relationship

Clarify Intentions: Clearing the Air

Misinterpretations can escalate conflicts, so it’s important to clarify your intentions early on. Sharing your true motivations can help clear up any misunderstandings and show your commitment to resolving the issue.

For example, if a colleague thinks you’re stepping on their toes with a new project initiative, sit down with them and explain that your goal is to enhance team success, not overshadow anyone.

Seek Feedback: Listening and Learning

Understanding how your message came across can be enlightening. While you might not always be comfortable asking everyone involved, getting insight directly from the affected party, or from a trusted manager or colleague can help you see the other side of the coin and understand the impact of your words and actions.

It's like checking your mirrors and blind spots while driving; it helps you understand your surroundings better and avoid accidents. Plus, it helps people feel understood.

Reinforce Relationships: Building Through Positive Interactions

After a fallout, focus on reinforcing relationships. This can be through seeking opinions, collaborating on projects, or simply offering genuine compliments. Positive interactions can help overshadow past negative experiences.

3. Pivot: Try A New Communication Approach

Seek Expert Opinion: Finding Guidance

There’s no shame in seeking help. Consulting a mentor, HR, or even a professional coach can provide new perspectives and strategies on handling the situation, possibly through role play or guided advice.

Explore Alternatives: Persisting Through Less Conventional Paths

When the direct route doesn’t work, look for alternative paths. This might mean adjusting your requests or leveraging broader networks outside your immediate environment. There’s more than one way to achieve your goals.

For example, if your idea is initially rejected, look for alternative methods to present it, such as through a different format or at a more appropriate time, or consider getting endorsements from other influencers within the organization.

Adapt Communication: Following up with New Approaches

If your first approach to communication didn’t work, modify how you advocate for yourself. This is like switching the fishing bait when you’re not catching anything. Sometimes a different approach is all you need. ?But don’t give up on speaking your mind. This involves direct communication, demonstrating the benefits of your suggestions, and continuously seeking feedback to refine your approach.

Remember: It’s better to speak up and make mistakes than to remain silent. Each misstep is a learning opportunity, and with these strategies, you can ensure that every word you say, even if initially misunderstood, contributes positively to your personal and professional development.

Embrace Your Unapologetic Voice

Unleash your Unapologetic Voice with the inspirational stories of these 101 leaders who dared to speak their minds at work and did so with diplomacy.?Get your copy of the ‘Unapologetic Voice: 101 Real-World Strategies for Brave Self-Advocacy & Bold Leadership’ book today.

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