When self-doubt and failure challenge you, try this.

You might need to hear this today. I don't usually share much about myself, but this is a story I recently shared with my subscribers.

When things feel sweaty, messy, out of control, or destined for failure, Compassion isn't always the first thing on your mind.

In fact, the thought of being compassionate to yourself in moments of failure, might have you yelling?"Well THAT'S not going to help, it will just make me feel sorry for myself, and give up trying!"

Am I right?

Let me take you back to the start of the pandemic and into the murky world of FAILURE.?

For quite a few months, I spent rather too much time sitting down at my computer, home-schooling, and baking outrageously good cookies, and it was niggling me that I wasn't exactly embracing the 1 hour of daily exercise!?OK, you got me! I wasn't really doing ANY exercise at all.

So after a few months of feeling like a bloated, exhausted, balloon, I decided to invest in the Joe Wicks App, with the secret mission of getting myself back on track and bursting with vigour.

It went well for a while, although keeping it secret from my family was idiotic!?I was embarrassed about my desire to get fit again, but I would have done better to get them on board with my cunning plan.

(Lesson 1 - if you want to do something, get the support of people around you.)

When we went away for a short summer break, I came clean and told my family about my secret mission, and everyone was super-supportive whilst I sweated my way through an almost-daily workout.?I felt pretty good!

But then my Dad got really sick, and within a few months he died, and I was plunged into a new world of disorientation and grief.?My exercise plan slipped.

And then, I was involved in a near drowning incident in Cornwall, and suffered a crush injury to my leg whilst dragging myself from the pounding waves and onto some rocks.?

For 8 months I struggled with deep bruising, swelling and pain in my leg, as well as the shock of nearly drowning.?My exercise ground to a halt.

I tried to restart a few times, but my leg would swell and I'd be in pain that kept me awake all night, so I'd stop again, scared that it would never get better.

Oh, and then I got Covid, and got stuck in brain fog and fatigue for 6 weeks.?That was pretty scary too!

BUT

All this time, I carried on paying for the App.

"Are you MAD?!"?I hear you cry!

Months and months of paying for something I wasn't using.

WHY?!

Because I knew the App was part of my motivation.?I knew that as soon as I took it off my phone, I would be metaphorically taking my dreams off the table.

(Lesson 2: Keep your focus on your goal, no matter what happens.)

I wanted to get fit and active again.?It was just taking longer than I hoped.

So I kept the App there as a daily reminder of my goal.?

It sucked!?

I cried about not being able to exercise!?

I got scared that I would now be overtaken by the menopausal joint pains that were creeping in.

But I never let go of my goal.

And alongside my goal, I never lost my compassionate voice that said "I care about you, I know you want this for yourself, and I'm going to help you keep focusing on that goal, no matter how long it takes".

It took way longer than I hoped, but I didn't resort to self-judgement.

My clothes got tight and my energy levels were rock bottom, but I still believed in myself.

And I kept the door open for the moment when I was ready. Because I knew the moment would come.

I worked on stretching first, to ease the aches and pains.

Then I started with the easiest possible workouts on the App.?The ones where you think, "Really?!?Is this actually exercise?!"

(Lesson 3: Take Small achievable steps to get started)

And I kept going, even though some weeks I had to take a break and didn't manage any exercise at all.?I kept coming back, and coming back.

My fitness levels have improved, I'm feeling more energetic, and now I'm setting new goals, confident that I can keep myself on track.

That's what compassionate motivation does for you.?

It sweeps aside the inner critic, and helps you to focus on what's really important to you.?

Instead of making you dwell on things or feeling sorry for yourself, it allows you to acknowledge that things are tough, and adjust your path and increase your self-support, until you are back on track.

Compassion isn't weak.?It's brave.

(Lesson 4: Compassionate Motivation is powerful!)

It wasn't something I used to find easy, but I've learned how to cultivate my inner cheerleader, honest best friend, and motivator.?

You could too!

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