When my fab qualities started getting in my way...
Parul Banka
Helping mid-senior leaders bounce back, rebuild successful careers & happy lives when life happens. Leadership & Career Coach. Facilitator. Storyteller. EDI advocate. Trauma Informed. A career break=pause, not full stop.
I grew up on a huge dose of being driven and goal-orientated. These are two fab qualities that have served me well...well, at least most of the time.
However, they also made me someone who always worried about ‘how quickly’ I could get things done. ‘I get things done in a jiffy’ became one of the badges that I wore with pride.
Obvious impact? Stress, anxiety, fear.
Deeper impact? Beating myself over not achieving results as quickly as I wanted to. Soon it turned into ‘I probably don’t know what I am doing because what I am doing is not working…at least not quickly enough’.
Worse impact: I am not good enough.
Rock bottom moment: I am not good enough and I need someone else to rescue me, my life and my business.
You can see where this is going. When we start doubting ourselves, we are headed towards a sure shot downward spiral.
A downward spiral that had its origin in two amazing qualities - being driven and goal-orientated.
Things changed for me when my coach picked up this pattern and held up a mirror to me. She showed me how my positive qualities were getting in my way and how I was enough and needed no one to rescue my business.
What I really needed was to give myself time and permission to build my business.
Result: I stopped beating myself over ‘my story’ about the speed of things. I had a better handle on my stress. I was enjoying my life and work.
There was no desperate energy in what I was building.
Because in my new story I was enough. And I knew enough.
Are your fab qualities getting in your way of you going further? Drop a message; let’s have these pesky stories sorted once and for all.
#coaching #storytelling
Helping Eco-Conscious engaged couples to have an AUTHENTIC WEDDING that DOESN'T COST THE EARTH. With my ELOPEMENT and OUTDOOR CEREMONIES in any location you choose. Go Wild and break free from dull officialdom.
5 年this resonates with me - thanks for the insight
I free people from pain, overwhelm and life stresses, so they can live a life with with Ease & Joy.
5 年By surrendering to allowing, all will fall in its place at the right time. the more one?has a need to make things happening we move into the resistance of it not happening yet, we block it to come to us. At least that is my take, it causes less stress in my life.??
Counsellor & Coach | Mental Health Trainer | Mindfulness Teacher
5 年This resonates with me. I have a perfection driver that used to dominate. It's a fab quality but also one to be aware of. ????
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5 年Ohhh brilliant post. Awareness is everything and working out what serves us is powerful?
Passion to Boutique Business - burnout-free growth for successful solopreneurs (without turning into a manager, marketer or tech whiz) Author. Host of the award-winning Soul Touched by Dogs podcast.
5 年Every gift has a dark side. Great post!