When a girl says nothing it means something? ….decent people will go to extraordinary ... Or suffer in silence…..part 128

"Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine." This is NOT permission; it's a dare!

Tread carefully my friend. Nothing=Something 90% of the time.

Don't hound her for an explanation as to what’s wrong but instead ask her once, and then let her know you care about her and that she can come to you with anything.

Trust is what it all boils down to, does she trust you enough to open up about maybe her insecurities with herself, her relationship with you or anyone really.

It’s hard to read people sometimes so there may be truly nothing wrong or she may be too scared, nervous, insecure, embarrassed, or shy to tell you. Again, it could actually be that there is nothing wrong. 

She hasn’t worked it out yet.

On a less bleak note, a woman might also say that nothing’s wrong because she hasn’t yet worked out what is wrong.

Women are, generally speaking, pretty adroit with nuanced emotions, but being capable of deep introspection also means there can be a lot to unpack, and—for reasons stated above—we want to make sure we bring up problems in a healthy, constructive way that doesn’t seem like we’re throwing the kitchen sink at you.

It can feel very Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” to bring up a relationship problem with a man: You only get one shot. (If you bring it up a lot, you’re nagging.) Sometimes I simply don’t know yet why I’ve been feeling hurt, and I’m trying to figure out if it’s just a me problem.

She just doesn’t have the energy.

This one is a classic. A big part of being in a mature relationship is learning that, yes, you need to bring up problems when they arise. But you also learn that some problems just go away on their own. So when a woman says she’s fine, she might just be hoping this is one of those problems that solve themselves.

Maybe the problem is only salient in this particular moment, and isn’t recurring, i.e. she’s upset that you didn’t plan well enough to come over to her parents’ anniversary dinner. Or maybe it’s short-term:

While you’re looking to buy a new car, you both have to share one, and she fills up the tank twice in a row. Or maybe it’s simply a battle she doesn’t want to fight. Either way, she might have decided that it’s simply not worth the energy it takes to sit down and have a discussion about what she feels when you leave clothes next to, rather than inside of, the hamper.

Your needling her to tell you what’s wrong is only going to require more energy from her, not less. So let it go for now, but also consider whether there’s anything you could be doing to make life a bit easier for her, and then do it. She should be (and likely is) doing the same thing for you.

Maybe she’s asked you 40 times before not to leave your rec-league hockey equipment in the back of the car where it smells disgusting.

Or she’s asked you to help with the thank-you cards after your kid’s birthday party three times. At some point, reiterating how she feels about these things isn’t just frustrating, it’s a total waste of time.

At this point, she gives up on you, does the thank-you notes herself, and moves on. Do not let a grievance reach this point.

Disclaimer: The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice. The opinions expressed within this article are the personal opinions of the author. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensure discussion or debate. 

Thank you …I assumed everyone would go out of their way to treat each other well. I thought we were all living in a world where we respected each other and each other's choices. I thought being considerate towards others would mean others would be equally considerate towards me. Turns out, I was wrong.

On the other hand, there have been plenty of people who saw my being polite as an opportunity to test my boundaries. There have been many who saw my being kind as a sign to trample all over me. Apparently, when you're seen as a good girl, people think they can get away with anything, because they know you'll continue to behave like a mature, respectful adult regardless of what's thrown in your face.

People will always ask for help. You probably do, too, as do I. There is nothing wrong with that, and nothing wrong with helping. Unless you're exhausted. Wiped. And burned-out.

You can't say yes to everything, and you can't help everyone. You have to put yourself, your health, and your well-being first and foremost. If you don't, there will be nothing left of you, and then you will be able to help no one.

If somebody disrespects you, don't ignore it. If somebody is being rude, point it out to them. If somebody tries to change you, tell them you're happy with who you are. If you don't speak up, nobody will hear you. If you don’t put boundaries up, people will keep pushing them. Be brave, be bold, and be loud.

Want to add word or two?

There is nothing wrong with living your life according to your values. There is nothing wrong with making the life choices that are right for you. There is nothing wrong with you. Believe that — and stand tall with it.

People often try to influence your life trajectory or give clear opinions on what they think you should do, especially if you're a good girl. Don't let them sway you. Thank them for their input, and tell them that you have made your decision based on what you

Transforming from a good girl to a strong girl doesn't mean you start being rude. You will continue to be polite, considerate, and respectful — but you will no longer do so at your expense.

Your comment ….? 

Time is so damn important. It's precious and should never be wasted on someone who doesn't make your heart scream. So I'm hesitant in giving it just to anyone. I love a woman's companionship, but I'm not desperate for attention.

While most men find value in making themselves available to any woman that gives them the time of day, I've made myself unavailable to most. Unorthodox, yes... but I value quality over quantity.

As for the ones who have gotten my time? Some have been kind, others not so much -- yet none have ever made my heart beat the way it once did.

I guess I expect to look at someone and just want every piece of them in my life. Their mind, body and soul... their hopes, dreams and fears.

I've thought at times, "Maybe it's me. Maybe I just don't have the emotional capacity to feel that strongly for someone again."

You start to believe that pain sort of scars you and that everything you're looking for is unrealistic, especially when you're part of a generation whose dating habits consist of swiping on a screen.

Do I find that disappointing? For sure.

But settling for mediocre love isn't something I am willing to do. Not in this life anyway.

So willingly, I've walked alone. In hopes that one day I'll take a glance at someone and feel that fire burn violently inside me once again. Someone whose hand I'll grab and march together with toward the moon.

Given the small amount of context, it could be any number of things.

Many of the answers above are possibilities-not worth responding to, they don't think you'll listen, they think you'll react negatively if they did reply, they want to give you the cold shoulder, they just want you to leave them alone, they think you could just look at them and tell anyway, etc.

I would posit that "Nothing", like most words, has many meanings that change in context. In the latter case, I'd find it interesting that you'd suggest silence is meaningless.