When Does Anxiety Become a Problem?

Anxiety is one of the most common issues my clients are seeking help with right now, so I thought it was timely to provide an insight into anxiety.

Why we have to take anxiety seriously

A recent survey by the Mental Health Foundation found that nearly three-quarters of the population had felt anxious at least sometimes in the previous two weeks, with 20% anxious most or all of the time.?

For those who had felt anxious in the previous two weeks, more than a third stated it had interfered with their day-to-day life.

Nearly half the young people (18 to 24-year-olds) in the research indicated that anxiety had affected their day-to-day life to a great or moderate extent.

What’s the difference between anxiety and feeling anxious?

Feeling stressed or anxious is a natural response that helps us to cope with challenging situations.

In small amounts, feeling stressed or anxious can be positive. For example, being worried about meeting a deadline can lead to you actually taking action instead of procrastinating! So, in circumstances like these, stress can be motivating.

But when it becomes prolonged and stops enjoyment from everyday life, that’s when action is required.

What causes stress and anxiety?

Generally, stress is a response to an external cause, such as a tight deadline for a piece of work or an argument with your boss or a family member. It subsides once the situation has been resolved (the cause of the stress, the ‘stressor’, has been removed). Since stress is caused by external factors, it can often be resolved by dealing with those; for example, finishing that piece of work or having a direct conversation.

If the cause can’t immediately be resolved, there are ways to deal with the symptoms of stress such as getting active, breathing exercises, or mindfulness.

We can all experience periods of stress, but anxiety is a persistent set of excessive worries that won’t go away, even in the absence of stressors. It can be caused by too much or prolonged stress, or from feelings of ‘I’m different’, ‘There’s something wrong with me’ or ‘I’m not good enough’.

A need for control

“Our anxiety does not come from thinking about the future, but from wanting to control it.” - Kahlil Gibran

A common cause of anxiety is a need to be in control. When I’m working with a client it’s important to discover what created the need for control in the first place.

It’s usually formed by a feeling of being unsafe as a child and not knowing how to deal with a situation. Being out of control becomes so uncomfortable that the individual either ends up trying to control everything or thinking of every negative outcome so that they’re prepared for the worst.

But we actually have very little control in life. We can’t control the weather, the traffic or how other people think and act. The greatest control you will ever have is learning to control your thoughts and how you react to situations. Once you control your thoughts, you really do control your life.

When does anxiety become a problem?

Today is University Mental Health Day and the question being addressed by the Universities Mental Health Advisers Network is “When does anxiety become a problem?”

Excessive stress or feeling anxious most of the time can lead to anxiety and depression. This can then be debilitating, for example being unable to face the day ahead or avoiding school or work. Most of the university students I work with have reached the point where they don’t think they can continue with their degree.

Teenage Anxiety

I know only too well how debilitating anxiety can be. My daughter’s life became so consumed by anxiety that it made every day almost impossible to navigate. So I’ve created the Guide to Teenage Anxiety to help you and your child.

My 3 top tips for dealing with anxiety

1. Separate the anxiety from your identity - always refer to ‘the’ anxiety, not ‘my’ anxiety. Never own what you don’t want.

1. Recognise anxious thoughts, but also realise that what you do with those thoughts is up to you. This is a very unfamiliar concept for a lot of people and you may need a bit of help to start with.

1. Be your own best friend. You wouldn’t say to your friends what your anxious thoughts say to you. And you probably wouldn’t stay friends very long with someone who did that to you! So be your own best friend and tell yourself that none of these thoughts are true and that you are good enough just the way you are.

Can anxiety be removed?

The only way to eliminate anxiety is to deal with what caused it in the first place.?

My daughter suffered from anxiety and depression and couldn’t even attend school.? Root cause hypnotherapy set her on the road to recovery and she is now travelling solo around Australia, which would have seemed impossible a few years ago.

You don’t have to put up with anxiety. If you want to learn more about how you, or your child, can live a life beyond anxiety, please reply to this email and we can arrange a chat.

Be kind to yourself.

Kate

Helping your child to navigate anxious thoughts

Often when a child is experiencing anxiety, you will see the resulting behaviour (not wanting to go to school, poor sleep, change in eating patterns) but it can be difficult for them to explain how they’re feeling. This new, free activity is designed to help them identify their feelings and explain what could make a difference.