When to Decline A Job Offer

You finally got the nerve to leave a job that wasn’t paying you; both financially and spiritually. You put yourself out there, brushed off your resume, and got to work. You’ve gone through multiple rounds of interviews for a company. You receive the offer; the benefits look good, yet there is a nagging feeling in your belly. Should you take the job?

We know as Black women, navigating our careers means more than just taking every opportunity that comes our way. We must be intentional when making choices because, in corporate America, we are sold promises that often go unfulfilled. The choices we make must advance our careers safeguard our mental health and respect our worth. It’s not about finding a job, it’s about finding the right job for you. This is not your parent's job search where the rules of just taking anything apply.??

Today, I want to talk about why we must be selective, the risks of not being so, and how to gracefully decline offers that don't serve us.

The Misaligned Mission

Imagine this: you're offered a position at a company with a lucrative paycheck attached. However, something feels off. Maybe their corporate ethics don't match your values, or perhaps their mission statement is just window dressing without a real commitment to the causes you care about. According to AXIOS,? DEI funding, staff, and employee resource groups are on a drastic decline. The DEI backlash is real. Accepting such a position means compromising on things that fuel your passion.

We spend a significant chunk of our lives at work, 90,000 hours over our lifetime in fact. If that work conflicts with your core beliefs, guess what? It will chip away at your peace of mind and job satisfaction wasting precious hours that you will never get back. For Black women, the stakes are even higher as we navigate spaces that frequently marginalize our voices. So, what do you do??

How to Decline:?

Know that it’s ok to decline the job offer. Sit with the difficulty of that decision and affirm to yourself that it is the right decision for you and will save you in the long run. Respond to the job offer by phone preferably or by email. Thank the hiring manager for the opportunity, and be honest yet diplomatic: "Thank you for the offer. I've given it considerable thought and must decline as I am seeking a role that aligns more closely with my professional and personal values. I appreciate your understanding and hope we can stay in touch."

The Toxic Work Environment

Let's say you've done your homework and found red flags concerning the company's culture. It could be a high turnover rate, poor reviews on diversity and inclusion, or firsthand accounts of a hostile environment. Your last job was toxic so you don’t want to make that mistake again. You know firsthand that a toxic workplace can severely affect your mental health and erode your self-esteem. When we don't feel safe to express our authentic selves, it undermines our self-confidence and sense of belonging. It's critical to place ourselves in environments that affirm and respect our identities and contributions.

How to Decline

This decline can be more nuanced. For this one, you’ll want to focus on the positive aspects of the interview process and what you've learned about yourself and your needs: "Thank you for considering me for this role. After much consideration, I have decided to pursue opportunities that more closely align with my commitment to a positive and inclusive work environment." This is a practice of centering your needs and what you value first. Your future self will thank you for making such a powerful decision that will change the trajectory of your career.

The Financially Tempting Offer

Lastly, this offer is one many of us struggle with, and for good reason. Salary is one of the top factors for candidates when considering a job offer. When you belong to a group that is historically underpaid compared to other dominant groups it can be tempting to take a job that pays more maybe than you’ve ever made. So there you are with a job offer in hand. The job pays well—like, really well—but it doesn't offer much beyond the paycheck. Maybe the role doesn't utilize your skills, or it offers little room for growth. Maybe you’re in a pinch and need a financial boost so you justify taking the offer so the math makes sense for your personal life.?

It's tempting to take a job just for financial reasons, but doing so can lead to dissatisfaction and feeling stuck down the line. We need to look at job offers holistically, considering how they will help us grow professionally and personally. The number on your paycheck will be important as it represents what you’re willing to trade in exchange for financial gain. It will be a decision that is subjective and personal to you.?

How to Decline

This one is tricky, but honesty is your best policy. First, get honest with yourself about your values and what is important to you. With the help of a career coach, mentor, or therapist, get to a place of peace about your decision. When grounded, move forward with purpose: "Thank you for this opportunity; I'm grateful for your generous offer. However, after careful consideration, I've decided to focus on opportunities that align more closely with my career goals and personal development needs."?

Caveat: If you absolutely must take the job due to circumstances, I highly recommend having an exit plan in place so that you can strategically meet your goals within a specified time, and then move on. Use the job, don’t let it use you.?

Every job offer is an opportunity, but not every opportunity is right for us. We must be especially strategic about the roles we accept to ensure they positively contribute to our career trajectory and well-being. I encourage every Black woman reading this to think twice before saying yes. We must choose ourselves, always, and show these companies that if they want to work with us, they better come correct.

Over to you. Share your stories of when you chose yourself over a job offer. What did you learn? How did it benefit you in the long run? Let's keep this conversation going and support each other in making empowered career choices.

PS: If you are a Black woman contemplating your next career move, I want to hear from you. Message me for a link to complete a ten-minute survey and be entered to win a free advanced copy of my book, Dreaming on Purpose.