What's in Your Swag Box?

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What's in Your Swag Box?

This week, we’re so excited to be hosting another How to Be an Ally Virtual Summit . Twice a year, we get to spend three days with 500 people from all over the world brainstorming ways to make their workplace more inclusive. Over the years, this special time I get to reach others but it has also become a kind of ritual that has also helped me recenter. DEI work can get lonely, so this summit provides an awesome environment for meeting people who are interested in building up each other.?

Swag Boxes

Every time we host this meeting of the minds, we get humbling feedback about our honesty, knowledge, and practical advice. But we also get a lot of compliments about something a little more surprising–our swag boxes! That’s right, every attendee gets a box filled with goodies. Days before we cite a single statistic of academic rigor or guide a single exercise designed to hone professional efficiency, we make sure to let people know they’re also in for some fun!

Joy remains at the center of our work. We recognize that people join us from all different stages of life. Some attend as part of mandatory training and feel nervous. Many might sign up because of their own curiosity but feel intimidated by how much there is to learn. Others come frustrated by their interactions with toxic environments. For all participants, we seek to create a place of renewal, safety, and inspiration. Our swag boxes are full of items meant to alleviate fears and invite joy.?

But these fun items also hold deeper meanings that reflect values fundamental to DEI. As they were assembled over the last few weeks, these items reminded me of these values. Every summit, they help me remember why I do this work and what I hope to gain. With these reminders staring at me from an open box on my desk beside the computer where I write this, I thought I’d note some items and ideas in hopes that you’d feel the same affirmations I do!

1. Make room for focus?

One of the items in our swag box is a door hanger??. Participants can place them on the knob and shut the door. So much of this work is out in the world. We work with others, collaborate with proponents, and negotiate with opponents. Inclusivity thrives in community. But it’s important to balance that interconnectivity with some privacy. To think the thoughts that improve the world, sometimes we need the space to turn that thinking inward. These door hangers remind me, even a social butterfly like me, that in order to help others, sometimes I need the focus that can only come from spending some time by myself.

2. Remember to refresh

A constant crowd favorite is mugs??. These amazing items feature people with different skin colors, body types, and abilities. They come from Corrine Gray and Uncomfortable Revolution, a digital media platform on a mission to change the way we talk about chronic illness and disability. Their design reminds people to broaden their definitions of inclusion. As a mug, this item also reminds people to replenish. Allies, advocates, and activists spend lots of time working to benefit others. Sometimes, we forget our own needs. Filing these cups with hot tea, participants have the chance to remember the need to hydrate, warm, soothe, and enjoy. By including this mug in our gifts, we hope to remind people to acknowledge the individual needs of their bodies and honor them as essential to refreshing.?

3. Learn broadly

Many who work in DEI are pressured to feel like they have to be resident experts on all things related to inclusivity. Whether from others or self-imposed, the expectation of expertise can be exhausting. Whenever I feel that unnecessary, unrealistic, and impossible weight, I remind myself that I belong to a community of learners, thinkers, readers, and writers. To shift attention away from us to our learning communities, we stuff each swag box with a book list??. Elevating texts that have inspired me like Inclusify by Stefanie K. Johnson, Biased by Jennifer L. Eberhardt, and Subtle Acts of Exclusion by Tiffany Jana and Michael Baran, I remember I don’t know it all, don’t have to know it all, and shouldn’t ever try to claim I could. By being teachers who include lists of all the sources that have taught us, we try to remind people who are often pressured to be experts that they can find strength from remaining curious and learning broadly.?

4. Make space for processing?

When I was beginning this work, I stumbled through more mistakes than I’d like to count. Although I had good intentions, I said, thought, and did problematic things. At those moments of vulnerability, I had professors, mentors, and colleagues who gave me room to recognize my errors. When it comes time to watch others make those same mistakes, I have to remind myself to give them the grace that was given to me. One thing that works for me is a stress ball??. When someone says the wrong thing, it can be tempting to reply with a harsh comment as they’re stumbling towards a breakthrough. In these tense moments, I need to distract my mouth by giving my hands something to do. During those agonizing seconds, squeezing a stress ball helps me release all that pent-up energy long enough for people to go through those awkward moments of growth we all had to go through in order to be where we are. What’s more, squeezing the mess out of that thing reminds me to make space for processing as I experience the honor of witnessing others go through their own delicate process of growing. This brings me to my last point, which is…

5. Expect some mess?

This work is complicated and confusing. It incorporates sociology, history, and change management.

This work is complicated and confusing. It incorporates sociology, history, and change management. Beyond being interdisciplinary, it involves professional, ethical, and psychological issues that make people uncomfortable. In addition to being more personal than most like, it also deals with social issues that fill many with dread, anxiety, and anger. Even if you operate from a place of joy, there will be some tension. Even if you focus on the business case for inclusivity that improves the workplace for everyone, there will be some conflict. Even if you send out swag boxes full of symbolic items, there will be some mess. No matter how pure our intentions are, there will be miscommunication. Perfection isn’t the goal. Perfection isn’t even possible. The absence of discomfort isn’t a sign of growth. Mess-ups often are the thing that produces the most growth. To remind myself that the summit won’t be flawless, I stuff the swag boxes with crinkle paper??. The first interaction participants have with the summit is a box that opens with a few pieces of bright strips that get on the desk and floor. Of course, we make sure not to make too many! But the point is to remind people that joy requires some disarray. Improvement necessitates some confusion. Comfort keeps us what we were. Cleanliness preserves the order that always was. The brightly colored crinkle paper that awaits our guests when they open tidy boxes might bring some disruption but also some smiles. Why? Because if we want our situations to become better than they’ve been, we’ve got to expect, embrace, and even invite some mess.

????I Wish You Joy!????

To all of you joining us March 2-4, we look forward to seeing you! For all of those who won’t be able to attend this time around, we hope to meet you during a future summit. And for everyone reading this, I wish you the joy that comes when you make room for focus, remember to refresh, learn broadly, make space for processing, and expect some mess.?

What about you?

What would you add to your allyship swag box? What virtue or value of inclusivity would that item represent??

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Some immediate ways Uplifting Impact is overhauling workplace culture:

• Professional DEI Certification Program
• Uplifting Impact Podcast
• “How to Be an Ally” Virtual Summit

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