What’s RuPaul’s definition of success?

Anyone who watches RuPaul’s Drag Race knows its namesake host is a natural mentor. RuPaul (who you can follow on LinkedIn by clicking here) spends a lot of the show offering the contestants advice — especially when it comes to letting their natural talents shine. Those who listen to him often end up making it far in the competition and — ultimately — their industry.

Obviously, RuPaul knows what he’s talking about when it comes to success. Many people were introduced to him when his song “Supermodel (You Better Work)” was released in 1992 and climbed well into the Billboard Hot 100. He continued to make a big splash throughout the entertainment industry with his own VH1 talk show, his modeling career, his books, his acting, his singing and — of course —?his competition show that has expanded to several countries.

RuPaul, who now holds the record for the most Emmy wins for a reality or competition host, recently talked to me for the #OutOnLinkedIn video series from LinkedIn News, which is part of LinkedIn’s #ConversationsForChange.

You can watch the full interview here, but I want to highlight part of our conversation about succeeding in life — both personally and professionally. The conversation has been edited for length, content and clarity.

On your show, Drag Race, you’re often seen counseling the contestants on their frame of mind and not necessarily the specific challenge. Do you find that focusing on mindset is most important?

RuPaul: Yes, I found that in life most lessons are not something that you have to learn, they’re something you have to remember. The truth is that your deeper self actually knows the answer to most of life's questions. It actually comes standard equipment in the vehicle that you're in. So it's really a matter of clearing a path for your frequency or the truth or the source to move through you.

At what point in your life did you figure that out and realize you have to get out of your own way??

RuPaul: I've always been a seeker. And even as a kid, I knew that I felt I didn't fit in — a lot of people feel that way. I knew that I was smart enough to figure out a way to fit in. So I set about figuring out society and what's going on and what's really happening here. And I got it. I really got what it is people are doing. What I found is that most people are faking it. Most people are faking being grown-up responsible adults. Most people are very scared. Most people are hiding the fact that not so deep beneath the layers of their skin is a child — a very scared child — who really wants validation and love and boundaries and all those things that a kid wants from a parent.

You talk about finding your tribe, which for you were people who were breaking the proverbial fourth wall and poking fun at life. Is that what drag is to you???

RuPaul: Absolutely. Drag for me was a way of saying, ‘I see the role that you're playing and I'm going to — in a subversive way — make fun of the role you're playing.’ And, in a broad statement, say we're all born naked, and the rest is drag. Every one of us is in drag. People get distracted by the fact that we're prancing around and we look so good in drag. But the real story with drag is that we are all in drag. There is not a human alive who is not in drag.

One thing about breaking the fourth wall and being a boundary breaker is that it’s not always easy. Did you and do you still face resistance in your industry?

RuPaul: Well, that's a great question. I do face resistance, but not from the places you would think. From the time I was a kid, I was shunned by black people for being gay, by white people for being black, and by gay people for being fem. So what that tells you is that the human ego needs to put someone down to make itself feel bigger. Now, by the way, that never works... It never lasts. So you have to continue to do it. In fact, the oppressed take on the characteristics of their oppressor, unless they're able to break the chain — unless they're able to see themselves.

Many people have been challenged over this past year to reexamine their lives and careers. What’s your advice for people struggling to figure out what they want to do on the other side of the pandemic?

RuPaul: Well, I'm going to go back to know thyself. That really entails being unafraid of digging through your consciousness and being in a quiet space. I like to stretch, I pray, and I meditate. In that quiet time with yourself, you will find your own natural frequency that is there to guide you and to be to put you exactly where you need to be. But first you have to be willing to take the time to clear away the debris that is blocking your own frequency. Most people — because of maybe family or guilt or shame or relationships — get derailed by their own lives. So my suggestion is to find a quiet place where you can discover your own frequency.

We have some questions submitted by LinkedIn members. Kevin wants to know how a person can tell the difference between their inner saboteur and legitimate self-criticism?

RuPaul: That's a very good question. The saboteur has certain patterns. The longer you live, and the more you recognize it, you see that the patterns it uses — the techniques it uses — are all the same. The end result is always to put you down to make you feel terrible. Genuine critique is different from that because genuine critique has to do with solutions. It has to do with understanding what your goal is, what the objective of your goal is and going about finding a way to make that happen — which is a proactive thing. The saboteur is all about tearing you down.?

David wants to know how you redefine success for yourself as you achieve your career goals?

RuPaul: After many years of therapy, I realized that I had used getting famous as a way to validate myself and to get my father's approval. I learned that that wasn't something I wanted. And when I got back into show business full-on with the ambition I have today, my motivation wasn't my father. My motivation was me from the inside out — not from the outside in. If you're having a terrible time and you don't like what you do, that is not successful — even if you're making a whole lot of money. You know, I don't do this for the fame. I don't do this for the money. I do it because I get to play with my friends, and I get to be creative.

What’s your definition of success? Join the conversation by clicking here.

? Want even more #GetHired?

I go live every Friday at 12:00 p.m. ET from the LinkedIn News page to discuss important issues affecting job seekers and to answer your questions about looking for work. I spoke with Tejal Wagadia, who is a recruiter and 2020 LinkedIn Top Voice in Job Search and Careers. You can watch the episode below or by clicking here.

? The follow-up

Recruiters are on the receiving end of a lot of resumes. They see the best and the worst. Tejal Wagadia, who is a recruiter and LinkedIn Top Voice, shared her resume and CV advice in the last edition of #GetHired. She suggests listing experiences chronologically and focusing on duties and accomplishments. She said not to worry too much about the resume’s length, but you should limit your summary to about 10 - 15 years of experience. Wagadia also cautioned about avoiding “fluff” words and using templates. Here’s what people are saying about the advice.

? A lesson learned:

Need help staying motivated while job searching? Well, this LinkedIn Learning course can help you figure out ways to keep going during difficult times in your hunt for work. You can watch the course by clicking here.

? Other news to help you #GetHired:

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? Up next:

This summer will likely be a bit different for job seekers in some countries than the last one. People are getting out and about more than they were thanks to the rollout of vaccines and the increasing strength of economies. People — including recruiters and hiring managers — are bound to take more time off work. Job seekers may encounter more out-of-office replies than normal as a result. We’ll be discussing what job seekers should do during the summer months when things in the business world may slow down a bit in the next edition of #GetHired. Do you have thoughts on this subject? Join the conversation by clicking here.