What’s Love Got to Do With It?: How Our Romantic Lives Impact our Professional Lives
Natalya Berdikyan
Founder | Enabling Leaders & Teams to Balance High-Performance & Well-Being | Global Executive Coach (ICF PCC, ELI-MP), Leadership Trainer & Speaker | EO Board Member
Love isn’t exactly a frequent topic of conversation in the workplace. Sure, it might come up from time to time with a close colleague, but many of us try to keep our personal lives separate from our professional lives. We may try to tell ourselves we have a job to do, and the office is no place to carry our emotional baggage. The trouble is: we can’t turn our emotions on and off like a light switch.?
As I often remind my clients, emotions are energy in motion. They have a beginning, a middle, and an end. When we try to suppress them, or keep them from running their course, they only become more intense.
If you’ve been reading other Life by Design articles, then you know that emotions can either be catabolic or anabolic. Examples of catabolic emotions include: anxiety, sadness, loneliness, annoyance, irritability, and anger. These emotions and more are common when we experience relationship distress.?
The results of experiencing catabolic emotions can include:
- Inability to see options or to take action
- Lethargy and lack of motivation
- Defiant outbursts or resistance to change
- Manipulative or coercive behaviors
- Numbing behaviors like workaholism, over-exercising, and excess drinking, among others
Not exactly the kinds of things that lead to great outcomes in the workplace.
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It’s also worth pointing out that trying to compartmentalize our feelings is a fool’s errand. Emotions like disappointment, frustration, and resentment don’t just disappear because we want it to be so. While we may mentally try to store them in a separate place, this won’t prevent them from rising to the surface and leaking into other areas of our lives, including work.
If we want to be at our best professionally, then we must not turn a blind eye on our love lives. Doing so doesn’t have to be draining or difficult. As with business, some approaches are more impactful on the bottom line than others.
One of the most powerful among them is knowing and speaking the right love language. The five most commonly spoken languages include
- Acts of Service
- Receiving Gifts
- Quality Time
- Words of Affirmation
- Physical Touch
Want to know more? Join us for Getting the Love You Crave in Your Relationship on Wed., Sept. 22nd at 6 p.m. CEST. CLAIM YOUR SPOT HERE
Re Article by Jess Ramsey, Associate Coach at Life by Design Academy. More about Jess here
Turn strangers into a team | Founder: Unapologetic Movement: Devilish Advocate Giving mic ?? habits to Genz, Women & Introverts | Tedx, Europe’s #1 Female Speaker’22 | Method on CNN & Forbes |
1 å¹´oh yes! can't turn off your disasters emotional life at work. Except the northerners who have little emotional range, so perhaps they're better and more stable at work.
Helping Nonprofits Succeed.
3 å¹´Great info here Natalya! What do you do in a circumstance where you notice someone's love/personal life may be impacting their work performance but may not be your place to point it out or provide advice?
I help women in midlife get their mojo back and design the best chapter of their life | Transformational Life Coach | Pro-Aging Advocate | Author | Huffington Post Contributor
3 å¹´A great reminder about the 5 Love Languages - I have found this to be such a valuable tool in remembering that the way we are expressing love isn't always the way the other person needs / wants to receive it!
CEO & Leadership Team Coach | Keynote Speaker | Author | Real Estate Investor
3 å¹´Very interesting article Natalya Berdikyan I think 3 resonates with me the most as it is a difficult thing to carve out personal time when also running a business.
Executive Search Consultant advising clients on hiring for Boards, CEO's and CFO's. Member of Global Sports Practice
3 å¹´Wow Natalya Berdikyan I am hungry to learn more about Life by Design. I thought my compartmentalization was working.... clearly it is not. Time to rethink. Thanks for the insights.