What's If It's Not Your Agitation?

What if it's someone else's, and you're carrying it?

Humans are energetic beings, so it's entirely possible.

I am also an empath; I can feel and absorb the energy of others, something I developed to survive growing up feeling unsafe around my mother's erratic moods. Now, though, I am acutely aware that what I feel may not be "of me or for me". Over the years, I have learned to energetically protect myself and release the energy I pick up that isn't serving me.

However, it took time to know the difference. For example:

• For exactly one week, I had an employee. He was tasked to do something mundane, and though he didn't say a word of complaint, he was bored. Unaware of his internal agitation, I couldn't settle. Thankfully, he decided it wasn't for him, and I realised I like to work alone.
• For several years, I would become stressed on Sunday evening. It didn't make sense; I work for myself (my boss is lovely ??), and I had no reason to feel this gloom about the week ahead. Then my neighbour moved out, and I no longer experienced the Sunday night dread!
• I was on a train that randomly stopped outside London Bridge for 15 minutes, near a man who became visibly frustrated. Unaware I'd absorbed his energy, every route I took after this was closed or delayed. Eventually, I burst into tears of frustration, gave up and went home.

But don't think you need to be a believer to have these experiences!

• My ex-husband called me last year and said, "I nearly called you last night because I thought I might die in my sleep." To me, it was unsurprising; his upstairs neighbour had been close to death on several recent occasions, and he was feeling her fear through his bedroom ceiling.
• Ever walked into a room and known that the people in there had been arguing?

?? Why does this matter?

I have been super agitated this week, even though I have barely seen anyone. Other than the occasional person on my daily dog walks or when I popped to the supermarket, but nothing to cause these intense feelings.

I have been finding it near impossible to concentrate or create. Though I could meditate, I couldn't then implement my ideas. I found Ego's negative internal dialogue becoming louder and old patterns returning, like 'you're not good enough' or worse. I was in a funk, and my mood was low, which is most unlike me these days!

Wondering what was up, I asked my spiritual guide and mentor, Isobel Gatherer , if the cosmic energy was funky because sometimes it is, especially when encouraging others to ascend, but she thought not. However, she did remind me that I spend a lot of time on social media - the catch-22 of promoting my business, new book, etc. - and that I could be in the spiral of doom-scrolling, joy-thieving comparison, and so on.

She also directed me to this video from Lorie Ladd about what we consume online and how it makes us feel, which can be disconnected, confused, too focused on others' needs and wants, especially of people we don't know, etc.

?? This agitation is not mine!

Boom! OMG, that is what I have been doing. No wonder I am agitated! Wow. ????

I like to think I am self-aware. I have read Stolen Focus by Johann Hari ; I know about the deep regret of the creator behind doom-scrolling. Yet here I was, focusing on others and bringing in all manner of negative energy, especially agitation, via social media.

Immediately, I connected back to Soul. I reminded myself why I am here, what lights me up, and what fills me with joy. I felt immense gratitude for all I have, all I am, and all I am becoming. My mood switched, and I can again write and create. ??

?? Energetic protection

There are many ways to protect yourself from the energy of others and to be energy responsible. What follows are mine, and there are many more ways online.

• If you feel drained: use this wonderful meditation, Cutting Cords and Releasing Attachments, from Elizabeth Peru. (Even non-believer friends love it!)
• Twice daily, I picture myself standing in a shower of pure white light that washes away any energy that is not "of me or for me" or supporting my higher self and soul path. Then I picture beautiful golden light surrounding and protecting me.
• To help my ex-husband, I regularly picture violet light on the ceiling of his flat so the energy of the people upstairs doesn't seep through; he has not experienced the sensation again. I regularly do the same on my flat's shared walls, floor, and ceiling.
• And now, after this recent experience, I shall endeavour to notice when I am obsessing about others, especially negatively or in comparison, and ask, 'Is this making me feel agitated?'

What about you? Does this resonate? Have you experienced similar?

??

Thank you to everyone who has subscribed to this newsletter & shares each edition. ??????

I publish on Fridays at 7.30 am UK time, every other week. Subscribe & click the ?? on my profile to see future posts, or receive it by email by turning this feature on in your settings.

Curious souls:

• Join the waiting list for my memoir, The Damage of Words: A Memoir of Healing Self-hate and Gaining Self-mastery.
• Invite me to share my healing journey at your event or on your podcast.

Recruiters and TA leaders:

• Pre-order Reboot Hiring for your hiring managers (and gain goodies ??), or grab Edition 2 of The Robot-Proof Recruiter for yourselves.
• Book a design-thinking workshop to uncover and gain solutions for any candidate experience or recruitment issues in one day.
• Invite me to speak at your event.