What's getting in your way?

As I walk client teams through my Selfless Listening workshops, one of the biggest obstacles what Brene Brown refers to as “rumbling with vulnerability.” Essentially, the story we tell ourselves about asking for more information or insights prevents from probing deeper into our conversations with others.

·        I don’t want to bother them.

·        I should know what they’re talking about.

·        I don’t want to risk asking a stupid question.

These are just a few examples of the concerns shared in our workshops. These concerns reflect the stories we tell ourselves and reveal our fears, doubts, or worries associated with gathering information which may or may not be easily accessed; yet, have an urge to obtain because we know we need it.

The stories we tell ourselves prevent us from engaging in a deeper level dialogue about important business issues, challenges, processes, or opportunities which inhibits our ability to risk starting a meaningful interaction.

Rumbling with vulnerability requires we have the courage to move beyond our concerns, created by our self-limiting story, to begin a healthy and helpful interaction or discussion. The deeper we get into this exchange, the better equipped or prepared we become, the more we can share who we are, and the greater the opportunity we have to build a trusting relationship or enhance the connection. These are all powerful, productive and necessary outcomes.

The only thing getting in the way, is you. Next time someone shares something with you and you intuitively know you don’t have enough information move beyond the limitations created by your story and say “tell me more.” See where it takes you.

Dave Cooke, CEO, The Cooke Group, LLC provides education workshops for Leaders, Teams, and Sales Professionals around Selfless Listening to help Build Trust, Solve Problems, and Facilitate Change. Learn more about Selfless Listening.