Childcare for parents with big jobs... what's the best plan?

There’s no getting away from it: working life after you’ve had a baby is different. Your priorities change, you learn what ‘busy’ really means, you discover an ability to survive on less sleep than you ever thought possible. It’s especially difficult when there’s no extended family around. But you can do it. You don’t have to give up your big job.  

You just need a really good childcare plan.

Traditionally, ‘childcare’ has meant three options: nursery, childminder, or nanny. Unfortunately, none of these quite work for parents working long hours under pressure.  

• Nursery hours are generally rigid. If the nursery is open until 6:00pm, this usually means NOT A MINUTE PAST 6PM. For parents who can’t get home before 6.30pm, say, that’s just not going to work. Moreover, nurseries often close for a month in August, and also often have staff inset days like a school does. (‘Nursery schools’ are even worse, opening only during term times and sometimes only half days at that.) Worst of all, if your child is sick  -- which they are all the time, especially after hanging out with 30 other snot-monsters all week -- nursery won’t take them that day or for 48 hours afterwards. A barrister friend of mine recently had to keep her sick daughter out of nursery for 48 hours, as is standard. My friend’s husband is also a barrister, and both parents were due in court that week for big trials. They ended up having to decide whose trial was more important – the one in the High Court or the one in the Supreme Court.
• Childminders can be amazing if you find a good one living in the right place. (The latter is crucial as they work from their own houses, so they really need to live near you or it makes pickups and drop-offs a nightmare.) A great childminder is wise, experienced, knows the local area intimately, and can give your children all the advantages of hanging out with other kids – without the rigid hours and constant sickness of nursery. Many will take in a sick child, within reason.  You can often pay them overtime for later hours and babysitting. It’s a wonderful, flexible option. The only problem is… what if there isn’t a great childminder – indeed, any childminder -- near you? Increasingly that’s the case, as childminders are priced out of up-and-coming areas where families are moving in. In many parts of central London the childminder is now more endangered than the red squirrel.
• Nannies are brilliant. They work from your house (super convenient), they can shift their hours around, they get to know your child superbly well, and they can even sort out your child’s clothes, bedroom and food.  The downside? It’ll cost you. On average, a nanny costs ï¿¡37,000 in London – equating to more than the first ï¿¡50,000 of your salary. If you can afford that without blinking, stop reading and get back to your press conference or whatever it is that you normally do at this time. Otherwise, read on.

Recently – and luckily – another option has emerged which combines the socialisation of a childminder with the convenience of a nanny. It’s called a ‘nanny share’. Two families living locally share a nanny, who works between their two houses, caring for both/all children at the same time. It’s super flexible: the nanny can pick up from one house and drop off at another, babysit, run an errand, stay in for a delivery. If the children are sick, the nanny can still look after them. If the nanny is sick – well, there are four adults who might be able to take a day off to cover, rather than two. And of course, the cost is shared between the two families – meaning more parents can afford a top quality nanny than before.  The website www.korukids.co.uk helps families find another family to share with.   

Sometimes it seems like modern childcare isn’t designed for parents with big jobs. Or rather, the system seems to assume that people with big jobs have the gold standard in childcare: one parent at home looking after the kids full time, working through sickness and holidays, providing love and wiping snotty noses. For those of us who don’t have someone at home doing all of this, we need to get a great plan in place. Luckily, there are good options out there that allow parents to focus their scarce time on cuddles rather than admin.

Or sleep. That’s good too.